This is such a good point.

It reminds me of teaching programming, actually, because I struggle so hard to get people *out* of this mindset. People come into tech thinking that if they can't accomplish something alone in their basement with no friends that they aren't good at it. https://twitter.com/polotek/status/1345823796071055365

And it is genuinely hard to figure out how to successfully push back on this as a teacher, because it's so ingrained in society, and feels particularly virulent in tech. There's a lot of "if you're not a toxic individualist, then you don't belong" in tech.

I have a speech I try to give every student at least once about how one of the best ways to improve and be good at this stuff is to build community and friendships with nice, helpful people who are also doing it and can answer questions or offer encouragement when it's hard.

It is *so frustrating* to see people *ashamed* of asking questions when they are literally *paying me to answer questions*.

"This is probably a terrible question"
"I know I should know this"
"I know I should be able to figure this out on my own"

NO. STOP. STOOOOOP.

It is HARD to figure this stuff out on your own and it's also POINTLESS to force yourself to do it that way. Figuring it out because you're surrounded by wonderful, helpful, supportive people is better. It's faster, it feels good, it's better in every way that matters.

And I can't help but think about how *useful* it is for rich people/corporations for everyone to feel like they *have* to isolate themselves and solve things in an uncaring vacuum to be good at stuff. How it keeps people from talking to each other, from feeling seen and supported

It keeps people from building the power that comes from strong relationships. It keeps people from unionizing. It keeps them from realizing how widespread mistreatment and gaslighting and harassment and racism and misogyny and homophobia and transphobia and ableism are.

It's infuriating.

And on top of all that stuff, on an individual level, it just makes people lonely. Toxic individualism is lonely. And teaching people that it's good doesn't help anyone. It just makes people feel inadequate and alone.