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Six Hour Can Opener Bean Dad is just a symptom of the pervasive notion that children aren't people
If Bean Dad's wife (does he have a wife? idk, whatever) called him into the kitchen & asked him to open a can for her, I doubt Bean Dad would force her to learn the schematics of a can opener because a) she'd be like "wtf asshole" & b) we don't believe adults need to be "taught"
If Bean Dad's buddies (does he have buddies? god I hope not) were over & one was like "dude ur can opener sucks can you open this for me?" I highly, highly doubt Bean Dad would make his pal wait six hours until he understood how a can opener works
If Bean Dad was at work and a colleague was like "hey can you help me with this?" Bean Dad would not even think of turning back to his Spider Solitaire game and say "you can figure it out, you gotta learn"
Yet Bean Dad not only felt perfectly justified in having his nine-year-old daughter not eat for six hours while trying to figure out the can opener, he was proud enough of it to make a fvcking smug Twitter thread all about it & then Surprised Pikachu react at ppl calling him out
We are willing to allow children to experience humiliation and deprivation that we'd find absolutely unacceptable if they were adults.
Because we don't think of them as people.
Because we don't think of them as people.
Children--your child, my child, all children--are separate, individual human beings with their own agency who have the same right to consent, the same power to control their bodies as adults and yet we deprive them of the ability to consent every single day
Since some of you dinguses aren't getting it here is what I mean:
of course there are some things we make children do because they HAVE to. Get vaccines, for example.
of course there are some things we make children do because they HAVE to. Get vaccines, for example.
But we make adults do those things too. Adults need to get boosters and flu shots and all that. And some don't want to but they still have to for health reasons.
Same thing with seeing a doctor, or any other medical intervention
Same thing with seeing a doctor, or any other medical intervention
And of course children don't have to experience to make good decisions all the time so parents are there to keep children safe and help them LEARN to make good decisions.
We do this with adults as well. Like when u tell ur drunk friend not to drive
We do this with adults as well. Like when u tell ur drunk friend not to drive
When I talk about bodily autonomy and consent, what I mean is...if a child does not want to do a thing (like kiss grandma, or wear a particular outfit, or talk to people they don't know) there is literally no reason for adults to demand that child do that thing.
Would you demand your spouse kiss your grandma? Would you demand your spouse wear THAT shirt? Would you demand your spouse go hang out with the neighbor even though they don't actually like the neighbor?
then don't demand it of your child
then don't demand it of your child
And look, I'm a parent. I'm not perfect but I have always let my child make her own decisions regarding her body. She wants her hair cut? Fine. She wants to wear a dinosaur sweatshirt with an Elsa skirt to Thanksgiving? Go for it.
Children are people. They deserve to have as much control as is safe over their bodies and their environment. Sure, there are things they have to do just like there are things adults have to do. But beyond that?
Let them know they own their bodies
Let them know they own their bodies
