Read on Twitter
At the end of this tough year I see loads of people on kink twitter looking for a dominant.
Please remember D/s is a negotiated power exchange based on informed consent.
Don't let any potential dom/me undermine your consent or limits, or convince you that your needs don't matter.
Please remember D/s is a negotiated power exchange based on informed consent.
Don't let any potential dom/me undermine your consent or limits, or convince you that your needs don't matter.
Healthy D/s is founded on informed, consensual negotiations between equals.
Roles & responsibilities may change once a D/s dynamic has been agreed but when negotiating/ discussing, everyone is equal.
And consent can *always* be withdrawn, and dynamics ended or renegotiated.
Roles & responsibilities may change once a D/s dynamic has been agreed but when negotiating/ discussing, everyone is equal.
And consent can *always* be withdrawn, and dynamics ended or renegotiated.
A red flag: any potential dominant who thinks that submissives exist to be blank slates for their fantasies.
Submissives are *not* automatons, they are people with needs and wants of their own! Power may be exchanged but everyone should be equally fulfilled.
Submissives are *not* automatons, they are people with needs and wants of their own! Power may be exchanged but everyone should be equally fulfilled.
As an aside to any dominant who says "yeah, but I want a totally and utter subservient submissive", my point is that you should find SOMEONE WHO IS FULFILLED BY DOING THAT AND CONSENSUALLY WANTS TO TAKE UP SUCH A ROLE. See this tweet and the replies
https://twitter.com/Master_Venture/status/1191127713869959168
https://twitter.com/Master_Venture/status/1191127713869959168
It's ALWAYS ok not to rush into things!
You don't have to conform to D/s stereotypes - be consensual, risk-aware, communicate well, do what works best for you & whoever you're with
Never forget that submissives matter as much as any dominant
*You* matter. Don't be told otherwise.
You don't have to conform to D/s stereotypes - be consensual, risk-aware, communicate well, do what works best for you & whoever you're with
Never forget that submissives matter as much as any dominant
*You* matter. Don't be told otherwise.
For more on not having to adhere to stereotypes in D/s, here is a short* thread: https://twitter.com/Master_Venture/status/1169941611356274688
*Sorry, I lied. It's long. But the point is that there's no essential list of kink stereotypes or D/s activities that you have to adhere to. Do what's right for you and yours.
*Sorry, I lied. It's long. But the point is that there's no essential list of kink stereotypes or D/s activities that you have to adhere to. Do what's right for you and yours.
Don't just talk to the dominants on here but talk to other subs too! Read posts by the many great BDSM/ kink bloggers & educators on here - there are so many great perspectives.
Kink twitter can be a brilliant way to make friends and learn more about consensual & healthy D/s.
Kink twitter can be a brilliant way to make friends and learn more about consensual & healthy D/s.
And if anyone is trying to isolate you, please do reach out. And not necessarily to dominants - unfortunately, there are many amoral shitgibbons who will try to exploit those in need of help. Other submissives can be lifesavers.
Whatever you're into and whatever your D/s or kink role, always do your own research!
And try to learn from as many sources and perspectives as possible so you have a broad base of knowledge to work out what's right for you.
And try to learn from as many sources and perspectives as possible so you have a broad base of knowledge to work out what's right for you.
A major red flag: a dominant who feels threatened by/reacts badly to a submissive doing their own research or who knows more about a topic than they do.
At best they are very insecure, at worst they're dangerous. Get out or seek support ASAP.
At best they are very insecure, at worst they're dangerous. Get out or seek support ASAP.
PSA: if anyone tells you that you're not a 'real' or 'true' submissive/dominant/switch/etc., then that says far more about them and their attitude towards you than anything else.
It also says a lot about their attitudes towards BDSM, D/s and kink in general....
It also says a lot about their attitudes towards BDSM, D/s and kink in general....
More on that topic and other red flags here: https://twitter.com/Master_Venture/status/1192940840512974849
It's your twitter. Do what's right for you. But be careful, don't trust blindly, always do your own research and remember that you are very important. You matter and you deserve to be happy and fulfilled.
In these uncertain times, it's natural to reach out.
*Just be careful too*
In these uncertain times, it's natural to reach out.
*Just be careful too*
I'll end with a link to this thread of collated D/s resources by some utterly brilliant people, especially on negotiations, consent & red flags - like 10 Golden Rules for BDSM Negotiations by Master Dale.
Oh, and follow @LovingBDSM and @Sub_Talk ASAP :) https://twitter.com/Master_Venture/status/888703597151752193
Oh, and follow @LovingBDSM and @Sub_Talk ASAP :) https://twitter.com/Master_Venture/status/888703597151752193
Thank you for reading and here is a dinosaur celebrating New Year's Eve while socially distancing. Probably.
