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This year has been tough and culminated in me burning out and signing off of work.
Here are some random and transparent musings/observations/actions etc
Here are some random and transparent musings/observations/actions etc
On the 4th Dec, I'd had a torrid morning but managed to put on a front and deliver an online lecture.
After that I self-certified from work for a week.
A few days later the GP signed me off for the rest of 2020.
After that I self-certified from work for a week.
A few days later the GP signed me off for the rest of 2020.
I should have signed off earlier.
I thought I was being weak by doing it.
I thought I was helping others by not.
I thought people would be angry at me.
In fact, flip all of this. That was the truth.
I thought I was being weak by doing it.
I thought I was helping others by not.
I thought people would be angry at me.
In fact, flip all of this. That was the truth.
I got to the point where I literally couldn't sleep without sleeping tablets. Even then sleep was hard.
If I'd taken a second and looked back I would've seen my sleep quality declining (amongst other things). But I didn't feel like I had a second.
If I'd taken a second and looked back I would've seen my sleep quality declining (amongst other things). But I didn't feel like I had a second.
It sounds simple, but I was incredibly unhappy.
I felt angry at everything. My temper was short (I'm usually a pretty cheery person, I think!). I was spending less quality time with my fiancé as I was always working.
Don't ever undervalue how important it is to be happy.
I felt angry at everything. My temper was short (I'm usually a pretty cheery person, I think!). I was spending less quality time with my fiancé as I was always working.
Don't ever undervalue how important it is to be happy.
I made less time for exercise.
I wasn't cooking as much as I usually would.
I wasn't relaxing at all.
My brain felt like it was an Internet browser with 100 tabs open.
I couldn't shut off from all the things I had to do.
I wasn't cooking as much as I usually would.
I wasn't relaxing at all.
My brain felt like it was an Internet browser with 100 tabs open.
I couldn't shut off from all the things I had to do.
Anyway, once I'd signed off I spent days just sleeping. Like I hit 14 hours of sleep a few times.
I came off social media, it wasn't causing any problems, I just needed less stimuli.
I signed out of my emails for a while.
I came off social media, it wasn't causing any problems, I just needed less stimuli.
I signed out of my emails for a while.
I've spent a ridiculous amount of time meditating and doing sleep hypnosis (check out @Chris_Fitton on Sleep Cove).
I spent a lot of time in dark rooms laying down, hand on my heart and belly, doing nothing.
I've started most days by doing yoga (check out @SarahBethYoga).
I spent a lot of time in dark rooms laying down, hand on my heart and belly, doing nothing.
I've started most days by doing yoga (check out @SarahBethYoga).
I started rereading @matthaig1's book, Notes on a Nervous Planet again.
Every chapter in there resonates, though the goalposts chapter is my favourite.
The book is also incredibly helpful. If you haven't you should read it, even if you haven't burnt out.
Every chapter in there resonates, though the goalposts chapter is my favourite.
The book is also incredibly helpful. If you haven't you should read it, even if you haven't burnt out.
I've booked in for counselling.
I had counselling before and it was extremely helpful.
I'm just gonna keep counselling going as a regular thing once I'm fully back to normal.
I had counselling before and it was extremely helpful.
I'm just gonna keep counselling going as a regular thing once I'm fully back to normal.
Anyway, remember that nothing is more important than your health.
