Today I’m cooking Iranian food to cheer us up!

I will tweet progress, as many of you know Iranian food takes forever to cook

Step 1:

Defrost broad beans

I have fond childhood memories of sitting on the floor on a mat peeling broad beams for this dish.

Step 2:

Rinse and soak the rice. Iranian rice is but we cook it very differently to English rice.

IMO no other long grain rice produces as good an Iranian rice as Tilda Basmati.

Rinse and soak the rice, with salt, for several hours before starting the cooking

Step 3:

I’ve now spent 3 years of my life birthing each and every bean from its rubbery prison

***intermission***

My assistants for this adventure have dismounted their perches and finally stopped trying to steal beans

Putting baby for nap, toddler in front of a film and I’m finally making a cup of tea

Back soon!

Step 4:

Righteo, we’re back

A huge bunch O’Dill

You need a lot of dill. Chop it so it’s finely chopped

Timing:

So I’m aiming for food to be ready at 4.30-5pm for an early dinner with the kids

So I’m going to start the rice going now as that will take 2 hours to get the outcome I want

Aim to start cooking your rice dish 2-2.5 hrs before you want to eat

Step 5:

Sadly I house only crap pans. The non stick in all of them has gone to pot (har...har...). I’ve had to use two small as I don’t have an appropriate big one

You need a good non stick pot with a well fitting lid

Rinse your rice a few more times, add water, oil & salt

Step 5 continued:

How much water?

I’ve always stuck to my mums age old fool proof measurement. The water should go to one finger crease above the rice layer

Right all set? Stick it on high heat and let it get to the boil, let it cook for about ten mins

Live action rice bubbling

Step 6:

Don’t let it cook through, just let the outside of a grain go slightly soft, then take it off the job, drain it of water and run it under cool water

Step 7:

Oil your pots again. Get you beans, dill, turmeric and saffron ready

Little hands stealing dill here

Now comes the faff+++

Put a thin layer of rice, then sprinkle some beans, some dill, some saffron and some turmeric. Repeat in layers.

DO NOT compress the rice, try and do Everything as lightly as you can

Ideally you need bigger pots than this but it’s all I got!

Layering all done, dollop of butter on top.

Now on low heat, with lid + towel, on for as long as you can leave it. For me that will be 1-2 hours

Step 8:

Remember those well fitting kids for your pot?

Wrap a clean towel round them. And put them on the top of the pots tightly.

Low heat. Leave for 1-2 hours.

DONT PICK UP THE LID TO HAVE A PEEK

Lid... do not wrap a towel around your kid and put them on your pots. You will go to jail.

RIGHT.

I’m sorry to tell you this but that’s only the rice...

We’ve still got the accompanying meat dish to go

If you have the heart for it that will be coming up shortly...

Oh man I’m tired

I’m gonna make tea and biscuits, squish the children’s faces and then we shall resume

Step 9:

I’m using chicken to accompany. I’d prefer lamb but I ain’t got any

Chop onion finely, oil in the pan and fry, and a teaspoon of turmeric once soft and browning and fry for a further minute with a bit of garlic

Step 10

AVERT YOUR EYEBALLS IF YOU ARE VEGI/VEGAN

Cut up your chicken thighs into cubes about 3x3 or whatever tbh

Stick em in pan with the onions etc, saute and add a tablespoon of tomato purée once on their way

At this point I also recommend a slurp of tea and chocolate

Step 11:

Add a big cup full of boiled water.

Get to a simmer and let it sizzle away on a low temp

Let some evaporate, you want a thick sauce eventually. Keep coming back to check and add water if too much evaps. Let it cook for an hour at least = flavours. Add salt & pep

***dishwasher loading break because my kitchen looks like an elephants taken a shit in it***

You thought we were done?!!

No... we’ve got one last bit to do before we can leave it all to cook/finish off and serve

Grab a cucumber and come with me....

Step 12:

Normally for this I would rice the cucumber into small bits but because my kids will eat it better I’m going to grate the cucumber

I would also normally finely chop mint but I don’t have any

Grab a tub of yoghurt too. Mix it all together. Add salt. Refrigerate

Ok guys.

Now have done all I can do for now.

Youngest is trying to steal the gin from the worktop and a miniature bus is dangerously nearing the hob

I’m going to sit and ‘relax’ for 15 before I get up and put it all together for our dinner

Baghali Polo with Chicken, cucumber Yoghurt and Tadik (crispy rice)

I need my bed