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As an aside and probably sticking my hand in the fire, there’s a difference between people who mess up but want to do better and people like JK R*wling who have dug in their heels as hard as they can on being terrible. We need to stop treating them as equally bad
Do you know what it’s like to be deemed Bad online for a mistake or misunderstanding? I do. It’s horrific. It is a complete bottoming out of your self-worth. It is daily panic attacks and deep, dark thoughts. It’s fear and shame so powerful it buries you
And unless your career is utterly obliterated, unless your social circle entirely abandons you, people will say you got off easy. I’d never wish what I’ve been through, what so many well-meaning but fallible people have been through, on anyone.
Shaming, cancelling, ostracising - it doesn’t actually *fix* anything. It doesn’t lead to growth or understanding. It leads to an utter loss of self-worth and total social isolation. And people will do it to each other at the drop of a hat. Again: unsustainable
Good people screw up but we refuse their apologies because they don’t fit our narrative. We treat them like we treat genuinely cruel, unrepentant and harmful people. No forgiveness, no understanding. In a world this broken we need to be way kinder to each other
I can’t fix what was done to me or what people think of me. I can’t do it for the thousands of other people who’ve experienced the same. Slap a label on someone, call them bad, unfollow, move on. Don’t look too close at their pain and fear lest you feel sympathy or guilt
I’m done for now bc my hands are shaking. I say this not for my own sake but for people you know who might be the target at any second for a bad tweet, a dug up old post or a drawing someone doesn’t like. You think you see the mask slipping on a villain, but more likely...
...It’s a human being with an ignorant spot or who was having an off day. Maybe it only needs one person to privately say “hey this isn’t cool, here’s some info on why!” as opposed to an assault from all sides. That doesn’t help them grow. It just silences them. Maybe forever.
Ok now I’m done. Please take care of yourselves and each other. We can all help each other grow and learn without tearing each other to pieces along the way. Be safe out there. 
