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PELI MOTTO
All the energy and enthusiasm of an excited older auntie who never wanted kids of her own but is an absolute natural.
All the energy and enthusiasm of an excited older auntie who never wanted kids of her own but is an absolute natural.
LUKE SKYWALKER
Has the air of a disciplined if slightly standoffish Victorian-era dad. He has the burping hold down pat.
Has the air of a disciplined if slightly standoffish Victorian-era dad. He has the burping hold down pat.
TORO CALICAN
Breaks rule number one: never put a loaded gun to a baby’s head. New Republic Child Services have been notified.
ZERO
Breaks rule number one: never put a loaded gun to a baby’s head. New Republic Child Services have been notified.
ZERO
MIGS MAYFELD
Crazy, funny, wacky, probably drunk bachelor uncle who comes round twice a year and enjoys playing fake drop-the-baby but actually drops the baby for real.
Crazy, funny, wacky, probably drunk bachelor uncle who comes round twice a year and enjoys playing fake drop-the-baby but actually drops the baby for real.
KUILL
The firm but gentle hold of a professional midwife or pediatrician, or perhaps a Depression-era grandad who’s raised quite a few kids of his own. Expert caregiver. Takes pride in his technique. You get the impression he's cleaned up a few nappies in his time.
The firm but gentle hold of a professional midwife or pediatrician, or perhaps a Depression-era grandad who’s raised quite a few kids of his own. Expert caregiver. Takes pride in his technique. You get the impression he's cleaned up a few nappies in his time.
IG-11
Somewhere in the “Nurse Droid” reprogramming, someone missed the subroutine that specified not strapping the baby to your chest and riding at breakneck speed into a firefight. Irresponsible, but the kid loves it. Like being babysat by a rugby player.
Somewhere in the “Nurse Droid” reprogramming, someone missed the subroutine that specified not strapping the baby to your chest and riding at breakneck speed into a firefight. Irresponsible, but the kid loves it. Like being babysat by a rugby player.
DIN DJARIN
Big. Dad. Energy. Din’s journey from faceless and clueless noob to beloved, devoted surrogate father speaks to EVERY first-time parent. From heartbreaking helmetless caresses to “riding with the windows down”, it’s just a gorgeous bond.
Big. Dad. Energy. Din’s journey from faceless and clueless noob to beloved, devoted surrogate father speaks to EVERY first-time parent. From heartbreaking helmetless caresses to “riding with the windows down”, it’s just a gorgeous bond.
CARA DUNE
Check the Mum Guns. Cara carries Grogu with the easy confidence of a soccer mum who can manage all the shopping in one arm and at least one baby in the other. Probably more.
Check the Mum Guns. Cara carries Grogu with the easy confidence of a soccer mum who can manage all the shopping in one arm and at least one baby in the other. Probably more.
GREEF KARGA
The classic shaking-hands-and-kissing-babies “politician’s lift”, with a side-order of genuinely doting grandpa who only gets to see the grandkid at Christmas.
The classic shaking-hands-and-kissing-babies “politician’s lift”, with a side-order of genuinely doting grandpa who only gets to see the grandkid at Christmas.
AHSOKA TANO
The loving air of a stepsister who’s a bit older than her sibling. They went to the same school, she was several years above him because he kept getting held back; she knows what he’s dealing with. An assured hold, but also respects the baby’s space.
The loving air of a stepsister who’s a bit older than her sibling. They went to the same school, she was several years above him because he kept getting held back; she knows what he’s dealing with. An assured hold, but also respects the baby’s space.
DARK TROOPER
Nope. Just nope. No support for the baby’s head and neck. Hard metal grip. Travelling with no restraints, high speed, high altitude, extreme cold and wind chill. However, one point has been awarded for not dropping the baby, against the odds.
Nope. Just nope. No support for the baby’s head and neck. Hard metal grip. Travelling with no restraints, high speed, high altitude, extreme cold and wind chill. However, one point has been awarded for not dropping the baby, against the odds.
JASON SUDEIKIS-TROOPER
Do not scoop the baby up at high speed. Do not stuff the baby in a sack. Do not punch the baby. You got what you deserved, Jason. Giving you one point anyway, solely for making Ted Lasso which immeasurably brightened my 2020.
Do not scoop the baby up at high speed. Do not stuff the baby in a sack. Do not punch the baby. You got what you deserved, Jason. Giving you one point anyway, solely for making Ted Lasso which immeasurably brightened my 2020.
FROG LADY
Despite going through hellish trauma and then being asked to babysit at the last minute, Frog Lady has the grace and patience of a kindergarten teacher who's blissfully unaware that given the chance, the kid would eat the rest of the class.
Despite going through hellish trauma and then being asked to babysit at the last minute, Frog Lady has the grace and patience of a kindergarten teacher who's blissfully unaware that given the chance, the kid would eat the rest of the class.
THIS SCRAPJAW-LOOKIN' GUY
The New Republic Surgeon-General recommends you do not hold babies at knifepoint.
ZERO
The New Republic Surgeon-General recommends you do not hold babies at knifepoint.
ZERO
Welp, this blew up a bit! I don't have a SoundCloud, but if you're after more of this kind of Star Wars banter, come and hang with us on the @ForceMaterial podcast...
