Just saw on LinkedIn that an old colleague from Magic Leap was leaving, and I wanted to send him a note. And I suddenly realized that I couldn’t find the right words. There were many great people that I really loved working with, but for some reason this one hit differently. /1

And then I realized what it was. Sam, who was in a fairly senior position, and who has basically genius-level intellect, treated me as an equal. That’s all. It’s a subtle thing being a woman in tech, especially one working in a niche field that very few people understand. /2

Not only people don’t understand your field, but when you try to explain what’s you’re trying to do, you get dismissed. The default stance is that you don’t know what you’re talking about, and you need to prove otherwise. Regardless of your position, or experience, or tenure. /3

You need to explain and prove yourself - over, and over, and over. And it’s fucking EXHAUSTING.

Well, I never got that from Sam. His default stance has always been assuming my expertise. Even when he didn’t understand my idea, he would ask questions, listen, and help. /4

It seems like such a small thing, that I didn’t even realize it at the time. And yet I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes. This simple thing - just being respected - actually meant a TON.

Not sure what the takeaway here is. Perhaps it’s “be more like Sam”.