Christmas is tough on a lot of trans people. Gifts from our childhood were often very gendered, in terms of societal expectations, and it’s often a painful memory of getting clothes and toys gendered incorrectly for you. But it isn’t just dysphoria. It can be existential.

Santa Claus is supposed to magically know everything, don’t forget. So how come Santa thinks my gender is the opposite of what it is? Parents inspect Christmas lists, so trans kids often must be cagey about what they ask Santa for lest punishment be forthcoming from moms/dads.

For my part, I kept my lists private and put them in the mailbox myself. Of course my parents would simply look at what I had underlined in my copy of the various Christmas catalogues. I made three letters every year: Santa, Noelle snd the reindeer.

I would ask Santa for general things, and I would ask Noelle (Mrs. Claus) got girl things, and I would give instructions to the reindeer about the acts of kindness I had done and how I felt that should reflect on my Christmas naughty nice record

Now, I’m not griping — as Christmas morning was always wonderful ... but it was also a source of anxiety when I received so-called boy clothes or so-called boy toys. Distressing. Even with the smiles. Here, I’m touching the magic bird because I’m having anxiety & bird helped.

Strangely, despite my parents holding virulent opinions on trans people, they nevertheless let me have the toys I wanted, if not the clothes. You’ll see in the picture, I got a doll and a rescue dog toy (Duke the Super Action Dog). But also a football and soldier helmet (sigh)

The doll, next to an awesome Popeye alarm clock I adored which had a long message for the alarm !

But just remember that for trans kids having an affirming Christmas would mean a lot to many. It says the parents see them. It says the universe sees them. Make sure if you have GNC or trans kids to please respect them and make sure the magic does too.