Hi, I want to share with you that activists do face coping issues. When I was sued by the Singapore prime minister and charged by the government, what drove me to fight at that time was the belief that truth would awaken people, and it was this hope that got me to continue ...

... writing on my blog and researching, in the hope of exposing more truths. It was this hope that gave me courage to cross-examine the prime minister in court for 6 hours, and this hope that led me to run for election. But when the votes started coming in, it was then ...

... I realized people weren't ready for change, that they continued to fear, or that my strategy wasn't right. Without hope as a pillar to drive me, I sank into depression. I am fortunate that my depression was not severe but I was aware of it after a while because I saw how ...

... some of my daily functions slowed. I could not bring myself to write a cover letter when looking for jobs, I became fearful of what else the government would do to me, and I began to understand the fear Singaporeans face and why they chose to remain silent to oppression ...

... Even as I was in depression, I wanted to fight and speak up. But when the police investigated me for supporting an opposition politician during a by-election, I gave up fighting and even volunteered laptops and thumbdrives which they could take for their investigations ...

... It took them a year before they would return these items to me. By then, I had left Singapore for Taiwan. Singapore's political persecution is very fine-tuned - most people do not speak up, and the few who do are thrown the whole weight of the government machinery ...

... to demoralize them and weaken them. I was fired from my job just weeks after being sued, I couldn't find another job because people were scared to offend the government (even international companies) and when people found a reason to abandon their support for me, they did ...

... As such, it can be severely arduous fighting a battle on your own in Singapore. As an activist targeted by the government, you are isolated, and forced to leave so that you become irrelevant. Before coming to Taiwan, I was so afraid that my employment would be canceled ...

... I had do a health checkup & I was afraid it would fail. I was afraid my work permit would not be approved. And even after weeks on my job, I continued to be afraid I would be fired. This is not an isolated experience. It was what another activist I confided in faced as well.

This is how it can break you. Months after I've been in Taiwan, I continued to fear that the secret police or government spies from Singapore were following me. I doubted my colleagues and people I met through Grindr or Hornet. Are they government spies meant to follow me? ...

... The reason for this is because the Singapore government sends spies after you. Once, I saw a so-called supporter who came to me during a protest to shout about how he supported my activism. I was charged by the government shortly after that. When I was out with my family, ...

... I once saw him loiter around pretending not to see me before I said hi. A guy I dated suddenly chose to end the relationship after 2 months, and I was told later he was sent by the government to be close to me. I've been waiting for the sex videos since. I just hope I ...

... did not look fat. The Singapore ruling party run pretty much by one family has ways to weaken you, spy on you, and troll you. Because I was fired from my job, it stayed with me so badly that for years after I came to Taiwan, I put all my focus into work during work hours, ...

... fearing that my company would fire me using the same excuse the Singapore government got the company I worked at to use on me. It follows you. I was sued in 2014, charged in 2014, went to court in 2015, was investigated by the police in 2016, and it took until 2019 or so, ...

... before my fears started to slowly go away. This is why I am always so impressed by activists globally who continue to act bravely. And this is why I am very thankful for the many activists who have said that being scared is part of the process. As someone who had ...

... very little peer support in Singapore in terms of activism, hearing these other humane voices sharing their plight helps give me strength & helps me realize that it is normal to fear, it is normal to hesitate, because activists are human as well, even as we try to be brave...

... and fight. But this is the strategy the Singapore ruling family and their cronies do to you. They try to break you down psychological, and use your livelihood against you to do so. An academic was threatened with his job by the law minister (or should I say guard dog) ...

... And the few of us who speak up and who leave, how do we share our experiences? How can you prove definitely the loss of your job is due to you speaking up? How can you quantify the psychological harm done to you? And this is how the Singapore government has refined its ...

... political persecution - the majority is silenced by fear while those who speak up are sidelined, caused to lose their opportunities, and to lose faith. But there are still people who fight fearlessly in Singapore - they are just a handful left in Singapore, and without ...

... a social support network, they have been immensely strong. Also, who do you trust to confide in your fears when you do not know if people around you are spies sent by the government? It is tough, and I want to share this with you. Singapore has political persecution, ...

... and it is done in a way that is meant to be stealth, so as not to disrupt the business opportunities the ruling family wants to attract for itself in the Singapore company it has taken over by rooting out political opponents since the 1960s. This is the reality in Singapore.

And I want to thank @jolovanwham, @kixes, @pjthum, Terry Xu from @tocsg, @joshuawongcf, and the many Hong Kong and Thai protestors for keeping up the fight. It is you who inspire me, because you continue being so brave in spite of the adversity. Thank you.

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