The goal of introspecting about your fetish isn't really to construct the narrative of how you got it, exactly. I can think of three ways of conceptualizing sexual fetishism and I could make a case that one of them is more correct and useful than the other two.

The first one is that fetishism arises from non-normative urges laid on top of a normative sexuality. This is the kind of religious, it's-a-sin perspective where you just have to resist the temptation. The problem is there's often no normative sexuality under the non- one?

The second one is that there's a class of people that are "perverts" that are just born a certain way. I feel this is a little closer to the truth it does set up a hierarchical binary between normative and non-normative sexuality, where it's easier/better/less funny to be normal.

The third one is to flip the script and look at normative sexuality as a type of fetishism. Not to look down on it, but to place it lateral to what I understand subjectively. This is the one I find most useful because it's not centered around othering myself from humanity.

The destination of your sexuality is coded by your subconscious, somehow. Some things "work" and some things don't and you don't really have a ton of control over that! But the bricks you build that road from are taken from the culture you grew up in.

It's easy to mistake the destination of that road for the colour and texture of the bricks. The destination, ultimately, is love and connection.

If your destination is taking advantage of others to fulfill your own private needs and then tossing them aside like garbage, then it really doesn't matter what the road to that destination looks like, right? It could look real nice, paved all slick, up to code and everything.