Making it rain on the bureaucrats right out of the gate, with $47,000,000 for "Processing, researching, and marketing".
Public engagement, support services, miscellaneous supplies and expenses....this is the administrative state pigs flooding their trough
Public engagement, support services, miscellaneous supplies and expenses....this is the administrative state pigs flooding their trough
$24,192,000 for the Office of the Chief Economist.
What do these guys even do? Always fun learning about government offices you didn't even know existed.
What do these guys even do? Always fun learning about government offices you didn't even know existed.
$9,629,000 for the Office of Budget and Program Analysis, which is amazing considering the government hasn't had a budget in like a decade
The Assistant Secretary for Civil Rights gets almost a cool million, with $22.8 million to blow through.
This is what your grievance studies can get you if your parents have the right friends in DC.
This is what your grievance studies can get you if your parents have the right friends in DC.
$4.2 million for the Office Of Ethics, which is f**king hilarious considering you won't find an ounce of them in that entire town.
$809,000 for the "Under Secretary for Research, Education, and Economics"?
Why do vague bureaucrats get this much of our money?
$809,000 for the "Under Secretary for Research, Education, and Economics"?
Why do vague bureaucrats get this much of our money?
Another $809,000 for another Under Secretary, the one for "Marketing and Regulatory Programs".
Again, who the hell are these people?
Again, who the hell are these people?
Small business are going to hell but rest assured that the screwworm program will still get its $5,000,000,000
Another $809,000 for the under Secretary for Food, Nutrition, and Consumer Services. They're expected to pay one other person out of that. Bureaucrats got it made.
The Office of Codex Alimentarius? These bitches work in the Hogwarts office? Anyways, $4.8 mil for the wizards
$5,000,000 for a pilot program to give a regional consortium sewer system contracts, which has the appropriate buzzwords attached to make it legit. "Historically impoverished communities"
Another $10,000,000 to push renewables in rural communities. Hope you're ready for solar farms to pop up in cow pastures that can power a coffee pot or two.
I'm not even on page 200 and first beer is toast
$35,000,000 for bodycams, $AAXN stock going to the MOOOOOON!!!!!
I guess Repubs had to put this in because last time Biden was in the White House, his boss decided it would be wise to trade a bunch of terrorists for a deserter
Are you in the Syria vicinity and would like access to $710,000,000 worth of US military weapons and training?
Here's all we need from you:
Here's all we need from you:
LOL wonder if Nikola got anything out of the "Advanced Technology Vehicles Manufacturing Loan Program".
The US government is the perfect idiot investor for that one.
The US government is the perfect idiot investor for that one.
$222,724,000 to update the IRS's "business systems".
You know, the IRS that said they were too poor to investigate super-wealthy offenders, and that's why they focused on investigating the middle class.
You know, the IRS that said they were too poor to investigate super-wealthy offenders, and that's why they focused on investigating the middle class.
Metaphor Alert: DC needs $8,000,000 from the Feds because it's literally overflowing with human shit
$135,500,000 for one federal courthouse.
We will be condemned to federal penitentiaries in only the FINEST PALACES IN THE LAND!!!!!
We will be condemned to federal penitentiaries in only the FINEST PALACES IN THE LAND!!!!!
I need a quick shower I suddenly feel disgusting
The restrictions on employee training are kind of interesting. Seems like a sneaky ban on Critical Race Theory, no? Good ammo for federal employees who want to get rid of it.
If the Feds are going to use our tax dollars to feed news stories to their pet journalists, they have to add a disclaimer. Big win, @GOP!
In exchange for their $600 windfall, taxpayers will be providing the Federal Record Centers Program with a $50,000,000 bailout to "offset the loss of user charges" due to the pandemic.
How exactly did that work? Are these record requests only done in person?
How exactly did that work? Are these record requests only done in person?
WHOOOA GO OUTSIDE AND LOOK AT JUPITER AND SATURN THAT'S FREAKING BADASS
The EPA is getting $33.7 million for new or improved facilities.
Sorry you're about to lose your house, here's $600
Sorry you're about to lose your house, here's $600
$59.5 million for grants for the "Water Infrastructure Finance and Innovation Program".
So if you strap a laptop to a water pipeline or something, you can probably get $10 million in taxpayer funding
So if you strap a laptop to a water pipeline or something, you can probably get $10 million in taxpayer funding
$10.8 million for the Institute Of American Indian And Alaska Native Culture And Arts Development Institute.
LOL $153,242,000 for National Gallery of Art salaries and expenses, another $23.2 mil for facilities.
DC has absolutely no skin in the game, not an ounce.
DC has absolutely no skin in the game, not an ounce.
Kennedy Center funding:
$26,400,000 for operations/maintenance
$14,000,000 for upgrades
Can't have our elites going to black tie balls in a shithole, now can we?
$26,400,000 for operations/maintenance
$14,000,000 for upgrades
Can't have our elites going to black tie balls in a shithole, now can we?
National Endowment for the Arts: $167,500,000
National Endowment for Humanities: $167,500,000
Commission of Fine Arts (7 members): $3,240,000
Advisory Council on Historic Preservation: $7,400,000
Our cultural betters are extremely well compensated.....by us.
National Endowment for Humanities: $167,500,000
Commission of Fine Arts (7 members): $3,240,000
Advisory Council on Historic Preservation: $7,400,000
Our cultural betters are extremely well compensated.....by us.
Guys I haven’t even gotten to page 1000
I'm down with this. Community colleges have some incredible technical programs hidden behind a jungle of useless ones.
There's a reason Joe Manchin is still in the Senate despite his state turning redder than the devil's dick.
The dude delivers real cash money to his state, his whole career.
The dude delivers real cash money to his state, his whole career.
Record American unemployment, and the ones who still have a job will be paying $93,896,000 for migrant farmworker programs.
I see you, Chamber of Commerce.
I see you, Chamber of Commerce.
Gonna go back to this $98,000,000 expense for the Capitol Power Plant every time they increase energy costs for us peasants over the next four years
Sorry you're struggling so much this year, but the Capital City needs $20,986,000 for their botanical garden and $24,751,000 for their visitor center.
May the odds be ever in your favor.
May the odds be ever in your favor.
An extra $5,000,000 to make sure politicians have immediate access to COVID care and testing. *whistles Hunger Games tune*
Hey remember that time the @GOP was going to get rid of the Export Import bank but now they just keep throwing $100 million at it every now and then?
Good times.
Good times.
FYI I've switched to vodka. I'm also missing the Bachelorette for this.
GOOD THING THIS BILL SLAP FULL OF KLEPTOCRACY INCLUDES SOME ANTI-KLEPTOCRACY FUNDING FOR FOREIGN COUNTRIES
Well, on the bright side, we can't fund the PLO. Unless, of course, the incoming President says we can.
Alrighty we're past regular appropriations, into COVID relief.
First up, ANOTHER $300,000,000 for NOAA fisheries. why is it always $300,000,000 for fisheries?
First up, ANOTHER $300,000,000 for NOAA fisheries. why is it always $300,000,000 for fisheries?
An additional $55 million for HHS. I'd be cool with them using a piece for demolishing that awful f**king statue out front of their building.
Blah blah tax stuff, blah blah PPP loans, will let the 80 bajillion other people tweeting about those handle it
Hundreds of pages devoted to wifi for minority communities.
This does not seem like coronavirus relief. Like at all.
This does not seem like coronavirus relief. Like at all.
Alright I'm gonna go watch the Bachelorette. Might finish the last 2000 pages tonight, might tomorrow. Depends on my vodka intake
Public education has become an absolute joke, but instead of fixing that, were just going to strap solar panels to them.
Former Senator Kay Hagan's family business bout to get PAIIID!!
Former Senator Kay Hagan's family business bout to get PAIIID!!
The feds are going to hire a bunch of contractors to contonuously evaluate how green their data centers are.
Can't wait to see the price tag of that vanity project
Can't wait to see the price tag of that vanity project
They're going to build a website to show us how green their data centers are, and join and international green data center harmonization project.
Definitely the role of government.
Definitely the role of government.
Sorry you're about to be foreclosed on. But at least you'll be purchasing "Smart Buildings" for the feds!
We are at the point where the federal government determines the specs of our ceiling fans.
Burn it all down.
Burn it all down.
Sure, let's start another bureaucracy. We definitely don't have enough people on the federal payroll watching porn and copy pasting reports all day.
Say hello to the "NEWS RD&D Committee on the Nexus of Energy and Water for Sustainability"
Say hello to the "NEWS RD&D Committee on the Nexus of Energy and Water for Sustainability"
We don't have enough green energy bureaucrats, so we're creating more: say hello to the "Federal Energy Management Program".
Climate change is a jobs program for otherwise unemployable apparatchiks
Climate change is a jobs program for otherwise unemployable apparatchiks
Feds are spending all kinds of money on geothermal. From $45 mil up to $70 mil a year on FORGE sites, $21 mil a year on projects, and more
So if you want more than $600, go into geothermal
So if you want more than $600, go into geothermal
Let's see how much for Wind energy R&D:
$125,000,000 a year. Thas a lot of chopped up birds and bats!
$125,000,000 a year. Thas a lot of chopped up birds and bats!
Feds establishing a minimum of 25% renewable energy production from federal lands. No wonder those SPACS are all taking off, they're about to bleed taxpayers dry.
Hm. This is interesting but don't quite understand. Are Oil and gas cos able to sublet to geothermal cos?
$200,000,000 a year for renewable storage R&D.
I really wish American small businesses mattered more to Congress than green energy boondoggles.
I really wish American small businesses mattered more to Congress than green energy boondoggles.
Carbon Capture spending:
$380,000,000 a year for R&D
$575,000,000 a year for pilot projects
$600,000,000 a year for demonstration projects
$50,000,000 a year for "front end engineering and design program"
$380,000,000 a year for R&D
$575,000,000 a year for pilot projects
$600,000,000 a year for demonstration projects
$50,000,000 a year for "front end engineering and design program"
Produced Water R&D (from oil and gas ops, something the private sector is heavily incentivized to do on their own, water hauloff is expensive AF):
$10,000,000 a year
$10,000,000 a year
LOL the "Carbon Dioxide Removal Task Force", because why the f**k not. They meet once a year, and in 7 years we'll reassess whether or not they are necessary.
The "Industrial Emissions Reduction Technology Development Program":
Check out this curve: $20,000,000 in 2021, up to freaking $150,000,000 in 2025.
Check out this curve: $20,000,000 in 2021, up to freaking $150,000,000 in 2025.
Another committee is born. The "Industrial Technology Innovation Advisory Committee"
There are more federal committees than American citizens, I'm sure of it. This one meets twice a year.
There are more federal committees than American citizens, I'm sure of it. This one meets twice a year.
"Sustainable Transportation R&D":
$830,000,000 in 2021, $880,000,000 by 2023.
Let's piss away more money on Hydrogen!
$830,000,000 in 2021, $880,000,000 by 2023.
Let's piss away more money on Hydrogen!
The federal government is going to support "independent media providing objective information" in Belarus.
Which is ironic considering the current state of news media in America.
Which is ironic considering the current state of news media in America.
We're going to support the development and use of anti-censorship and circumvention technologies in Belarus.
Which, again, hilarious considering the blatant censorship of Americans currently being carried out against Americans.
Which, again, hilarious considering the blatant censorship of Americans currently being carried out against Americans.
"Hey Congress, maybe we should make it harder for anyone with a pulse to get a pile of taxpayer cash for underwater basket weaving degrees, considering the $1.5 trillion student loan debt crisis?"
Congress: "LOL FAFSA LOANS GO BRR"
Congress: "LOL FAFSA LOANS GO BRR"
Congress didn't think the law mandating those stupid nozzles on gas cans was specific enough. So they clarified.
These are the priorities of the people who haven't missed a dime of their $175,000 salaries while their local cohorts destroy your livelihoods.
These are the priorities of the people who haven't missed a dime of their $175,000 salaries while their local cohorts destroy your livelihoods.
Congress takes back the T-Band they were going to auction off. Because government really doesn't like giving things back to the people.
Studying blockchain technology, drone delivery services, 3D printing, they are gonna study ALL THE THINGS
And the last item, the government is going to regulate the smolder testing certification of your furniture, since we're working from home now. Perfect.
I made it to the end! F**k them all! Top to bottom, Democrat to Republican, f**k each and every dirt bag opportunistic scumbag in DC who voted for this monstrosity.
Bastards, pond scum in suits.
Bastards, pond scum in suits.