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As both a historian and a queer person whose language for my own sexuality has evolved over time I have thought a lot about this recently: "...that everyone needs to have a discrete, historically congruent sense of identity that must be declared publicly." https://twitter.com/jamesfactora/status/1340362799822716928
One of the worst missteps of the twentieth century gay liberation movement IMHO was the decision to learn into the innate/essentialist "born this way" framing of what it means to be queer.
This isn't to say sexuality and gender are not a core part of the self. Just that when we allow ourselves to rely on ideas about immutability and fixity we end up with notions of authenticity that depends on being UNCHANGING.
People grow, change, discover, flex, respond to the world, to new possibilities, to new relationships. Yes we arguably have a core self but that self is mediated through *so much* experience and culture.
Maybe think about sexuality and gender more like religion ... in that it is recognized socially as a deeply personal and important part of human life. But it's not a biological trait. You might feel you have something within you that responds to the metaphysical. But --
-- how you respond, what resonates, what speaks to you as a person of faith, may change radically over your lifetime. But that doesn't necessarily mean your religious experience at 16 was less true to your deepest self than your religious experience at age 46 or 76.
I am so sad when I see (many times) young queer people policing one another here on Twitter around the use and meaning of words like bisexual or dyke as if queer language has ever been fixed with One True Meaning for every term, and each if us has one one lane to drive in.
LGBTQ+ history teaches up how wildly chaotic the queer party has always been, and how rare it is for any of us to remain in a single lane our entire lives. Change (uncoerced, freely pursued) can be a revelation even as we remain gentle with and proud of our past selves.
Just ... welcome home and happy Pride to everyone under the queer umbrella. We are all on a glittery rainbow journey. You're beautiful.
