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Still wondering if anyone else noticed That Atlantic Article not only perfectly replicated that TBM cishet male RM voice that’s utterly dominated church discourse within and without,
and its pluperfect example:
1/19
and its pluperfect example:
1/19
e.g. when he trots out the old chestnut that a church that demands less of people would be less special.
Peeps, do you not hear the sexism and ableism in that?
The blithe voluntelling of greater invisible labor by those whose experiences in the church were glossed over?
2/19
Peeps, do you not hear the sexism and ableism in that?
The blithe voluntelling of greater invisible labor by those whose experiences in the church were glossed over?
2/19
Friends, how can you call yourself a feminist and friend to women if you don’t see or care about the impact the church has on the lives of the many women making it happen?
3/19
3/19
I’ll tell you about just two experiences with our wonderful nobody-bowls-alone church and the authority that ensures women will make it happen:
4/19
4/19
First: The moment when a bishop told me I was forbidden from writing because “it’s a distraction from church service.”
He even leaned in and said, “You and I both know you’d never succeed anyway.”
5/19
He even leaned in and said, “You and I both know you’d never succeed anyway.”
5/19
He instructed me (with a raised voice) to take this command given by a judge in Israel to the temple and get God’s confirmation it was right. I was to place my desires on the altar as a fulfillment of my temple covenants.
6/19
6/19
I had been writing since I was tiny and at the time was a 27yo mom of 5 and was just trying to get by.
And I obeyed. I gave up writing for over a year until we moved and another bishop lifted the ban.
7/19
And I obeyed. I gave up writing for over a year until we moved and another bishop lifted the ban.
7/19
It tore me up, so I talked to people about it. You know what they said?
The MEN said, No! That doesn’t happen.
The WOMEN said Yes, me too, but you gotta catch the vision and strengthen your faith.
8/19
The MEN said, No! That doesn’t happen.
The WOMEN said Yes, me too, but you gotta catch the vision and strengthen your faith.
8/19
Not only are women, especially mothers, expected to put family and church before self,
I learned through sorry experience that you’re only allowed to talk about it if you then bear testimony to how the sacrifice for the sake of the church strengthens faith.
9/19
I learned through sorry experience that you’re only allowed to talk about it if you then bear testimony to how the sacrifice for the sake of the church strengthens faith.
9/19
Just saying that the church is harming people, or saying, as an active member, “the church is harming me”, this is not allowed.
Obedience—silent submission— is the first rule of Celestial Bowling Club.
10/19
Obedience—silent submission— is the first rule of Celestial Bowling Club.
10/19
Second example: My sixth child is medically fragile and I had #7 when #6 was 18 months old.
At the time I was also homeschooling my older five while putting my two church callings first.
Naturally, my health tanked, and I got really sick.
11/19
At the time I was also homeschooling my older five while putting my two church callings first.
Naturally, my health tanked, and I got really sick.
11/19
My pneumonia was so bad I couldn’t cook or change my kids’ diapers. I even had to put my kids into public school.
For months I was struggling to breathe and doing course after course of ABX for months.
I aged 10 years that year.
12/19
For months I was struggling to breathe and doing course after course of ABX for months.
I aged 10 years that year.
12/19
I finally went to my bishop and asked to be released from my two callings: Sunday School teacher and Relief Society chorister. I couldn’t stand, I couldn’t speak or sing, and anyone who’s had to get permission to stay home sick on Sundays knows how poorly that goes.
13/19
13/19
My bishop told me that I was a freeloader.
That just bringing my 7 kids to church on Sundays wasn’t enough.
That I needed to join the other moms in running all the midweek stuff, too, because it wasn’t fair to everyone else for me not to do my part.
14/19
That just bringing my 7 kids to church on Sundays wasn’t enough.
That I needed to join the other moms in running all the midweek stuff, too, because it wasn’t fair to everyone else for me not to do my part.
14/19
Then he took my recommend.
Not having the physical strength or ability to do the extra hours of physical labor the church expected from all women literally rendered me unworthy, because I had failed to make the communitarian dream come true for the men around me.
15/19
Not having the physical strength or ability to do the extra hours of physical labor the church expected from all women literally rendered me unworthy, because I had failed to make the communitarian dream come true for the men around me.
15/19
This marginalization then snowballed as it emboldened my stake leaders to further harm us.
Once a bishop declares you unworthy, it’s open season. Your records are marked. It will keep coming up.
Those who’ve been there, know.
16/19
Once a bishop declares you unworthy, it’s open season. Your records are marked. It will keep coming up.
Those who’ve been there, know.
16/19
But those who’ve never had to endanger their health to meet the church’s minimums get away with saying how lovely and communitarian it is and how important it is to keep requirements high.
Do you hear the privilege in your voice?
17/19
Do you hear the privilege in your voice?
17/19
Do you know how that impacts the Mormons on the margins?
You have a platform to speak to a national audience *and* to the church as a whole and church leaders, and you talked about how the church is constantly auditioning, hustling for acceptance—
18/19
You have a platform to speak to a national audience *and* to the church as a whole and church leaders, and you talked about how the church is constantly auditioning, hustling for acceptance—
18/19
—but said nothing about how the church in turn expects us to hustle for acceptance, too,
and the different definitions of acceptability applied to those who are cishet white RMs, and those who aren’t.
McKay Coppins, you were so close. You were almost there.
19/19
and the different definitions of acceptability applied to those who are cishet white RMs, and those who aren’t.
McKay Coppins, you were so close. You were almost there.
19/19
