It's 1979. It's Christmas Day. The house is a chaos of Quality Street wrappers, sherry glasses and Ronco records. The television hums into life. Only one programme can save the day. GOOD MORNING AND WELCOME TO THE 3-2-1 CHRISTMAS SPECIAL!


Hard to explain to people younger than about 40, but we were a "BBC house" on most days. You picked a channel and stuck to it. Remote controls were a luxury. So especially on Christmas Day you didn't flip. Which meant I never saw this masterpiece when it happened.
Some truly beautiful audience shots here. As ever it's my sad duty to remind you that everyone in this picture is now likely dead.
Hang on what's this? In 1979 you didn't get an elimination QUESTION. You had an Elimination GAME!
Very Generation Game

Simple rules. Two sets of rods and tongs and Christmas puddings. You roll the puddings down the rods but you put them on with the tongs, first whistle start, second whistle change placed, third whistle stop. Got it? G-G-G-G-GO oops wrong programme
Different format in those days. Quite surreal. The quiz was interrupted by 3-2-1 stalwart Mike Newman improvising gags when the couples got something wrong. Fun stuff
Let's get going with the SKITS. Terrific sets and costumes of course. Here's the first Dickens themed sketch with Terry Scott as Bill Sykes, on the nick
Caught by copper Chris Emmett, who I remind you wrote these classic era episodes, Sykes pretends to be at a fancy dress party dressed as a burglar. Punchline: Emmett was actually at the fancy dress party, dressed as a policeman! Runs off with Terry's swag
Oof. You will NEVER EVER EVER EVER EVER EVER guess it.
SKETCH TWO. You need a bit of cultural background for this. In the 1970s, school choirs from the North of England were, incredibly, seen as something other than cloyingly horrific
Dreadful. We endured some terrible things back then. CLIVE DUNN DOING GRANDAD (Rick Wakeman did the piano, music fans)
SKETCH THREE. It's only Bill Maynard, latterly of "Greengrass off of Heartbeat" fame, as Mister Macawber
Bill was in one of the many itv shows that attempted to do Some Mothers Do Ave Em, "Oh no it's Selwyn Froggitt" - David Jason also did one but the name escapes me
For some odd reason, Bill reads his part of the clue (along with Carmel McSharry, 3-2-1 regular) in character
"at Christmas, home's the place to be
Let's go there you and I
We'll have a turkey or an 'en
You'll get there if you try"
Let's go there you and I
We'll have a turkey or an 'en
You'll get there if you try"
NEXT. Who can you get to do Fagin and Oliver Twist?

Ian's Fagin is, well, it hasn't aged terrifically well, although for the era that was probably standard. A lot of "my boy" and grasping hands. Still, his trousers fall down at the end
Tough clues this week. Well, we've saved the best for last though. Ebenezer Scrooge is played by another titan of sitcoms. Amazed the green room had anything left in it after Terry Scott was joined by... WILFRID BRAMBELL
Quite a bleak Christmas joke as a lady asks Scrooge to donate to the "home for fallen women" and he kicks this young lady out

Mm.
Here's Mike Newman as Jacob Martley, showing Scrooge the Christmas ghosts. Past and future. And present
The skit ends with Scrooge chasing after the ghost in a sort of grim Benny Hill way. Not very christmassy imho
Wow. OK so we have five clues and one to remove before we search for the bin, so... Let's jettison the SWAG BAG brought in by Terry Scott. Any ideas?
A couple of you got this one. While we're thinking let's remind ourselves of the time Terry Scott drove off the Middlesbrough transporter bridge when he was pissed yet miraculously survived
This TV AM item about the Carry On Réunion is also great as Terry goes off on one about getting thrush from wearing tights while he filmed Carry On Camping, where all the gags coincidentally were about his bum
Babs is visibly embarrassed and tries to stop him
Anyway. Yes you're right. It was a SET OF CUTLERY. I like the cruelty of the earlier 3-2-1 series. The contestants have to go RIGHT UP TO THE THINGS THEY DON'T WIN
"WORTH WELL OVER A THOUSAND POUNDS!" yells Ted as they say goodbye to it.
YES IT'S TIME TO VOTE. let's remind you of the objects and clues.