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things you probably didn’t know about @lmgriffjohnson ; a thread
he wasn’t born in 1999, 1999 was born in him
when he was a kid, he missed two days of school. now we call them saturday and sunday
he has no reflection when he looks in the mirror because there‘s only one griffin johnson
when griffin was late for school, teachers scolded others for coming early
griffin won a no-blinking contest. his rival was a statue
when alexander graham bell invented the telephone, he already had three missed calls from griffin
he makes onions cry
thor got his hammer from griffin’s toolbox
once griffin wanted to touch the sky. the sky got so emotional with griffin’s interest, that it cried.. and “rain” was created
he doesn’t lie, the truth is wrong
griffin uses sunglasses to avoid damaging the sun
one day, a sea tried to drown him. today it’s known as the dead sea
if he visits your house, you‘re the guest
he‘s so talented that he can start a fire by rubbing two ice cubes
jesus walks on water, griffin swims on land
he doesn't need luck, luck needs him
once he blew up the universe for fun, today it‘s known as the big bang
griffin was struck by lightning and the lightning died electrocuted
