TW: Medical Racism

I got a diabetes DX a couple months ago that I felt was wrong, but my *white* doctor at IHS told me that the lab work didn't lie.

Today, two months later, I finally saw my lab results. Turns out, *he* lied.

I sought medical attention because I was concerned about my cortisol levels, especially after being on steroids for my knee that resulted in bad reactions. Tons of Internet research later, I went in with a specific request, and I came out with a blatantly incorrect DX.

Because I am Native, because I am fat, and because I have the family history I do, my doctor decided that I needed to be put on metformin that for the past 2 months has fucked up my entire GI system, caused brain fog, and tons of other shit. Plus daily glucose monitoring.

He told me to my face that my creatinine was high. The normal range is less than 1.5. I learned that mine was 0.8.

From cholesterol to my A1C everything was lower *in that lab* than *he told me* it was. Every single item but one was normal. But he put the DX on my chart anyway.

He decided that in spite of what I was telling him, what my literal lab results were telling him, the fact that I have never fallen in the pre-diabetic range, that all these issues I came to him with were diabetes. It's no accident.

My entire life, every single doctor I had was a white person who harbored racial bias and fatphobia that they weaponized against me. Everything from shock that my blood work was normal to reminding me to check my A1C every 6 months when I just went in for a pap smear.

Being told as a child that Natives get diabetes, so I had to be careful when I had a broken wrist. Being met with surprise from every urgent care doc, new nurse, a fill-in. Being forced to dodge random calls because the diabetes coordinator just wanted me to "be prepared one day"

All of it was and is medical racism. The only explanation for any aliment I may have has to be diabetes because that's what's always wrong with Natives. It is never the fact that cortisol steroids raise blood sugar, which can explain an elevated glucose level. Nope. Can't be.

I knew to trust myself. I knew something wasn't right. I especially knew the moment I took my 1st at-home glucose reading before my first dose of metformin and my blood sugar was normal (because I stopped taking the steroids 2 weeks before). And for the past two months has been.

But I won't lie. It fucking sucks. But what sucks more is that there is nothing wrong or shameful with having diabetes. All of this medical racism and fatphobia only adds to the stigma, which makes the disease worse. Which makes people avoid doctors. Which makes people ashamed.

Not to mention the added stigma in this fatphobic & racist society.

I was, and will never be, upset bc of a diabetes DX. It would mean I would know how to feel better. I'm not upset at the disease. I'm upset that I have been denied medical care. I'm upset about the malpractice.

I'm upset that when I called for weeks to get a copy of my lab results no one called me back with them. I'm upset that when I did get my doctor on the phone, I kept getting gaslit when I asked why my daily glucose readings were consistently in an non-diabetic range.

I am a private person. I don't share a number of things on the Internet. Hell, I don't want to share this, especially when only 5 people in my life know. But if folks don't know just how deep the roots of racism, fatphobia, and ableism are, we don't stand a chance of stopping it.

Oh wow. Mvto for all the support!

A few more things for context:
- My doc is in his 30s. It ain't just the old white ones who do this shit.
- I use Indian Health Services (IHS) my options are severely limited due to the 50% underfunding aka ongoing genocide
- Yes, I will report

So no one else needs to ask! https://twitter.com/UnrollHelper/status/1340353018303229953?s=19