I am begging all Asian women to speak the fuck back. Yell the fuck back. Fight the fuck back. They dare to target us because they don't think we will.

You're gonna get called crazy. My mom and I have gotten a lot of "crazy Asian lady" remarks in our lifetimes. Better to be thought crazy than to be thought an easy victim.

"crazy Asian lady" means you clapped the fuck back and they don't know how else to deal with it. Embrace the crazy bitch within.

I just want to come back and say I acknowledge that most Asian women were socially conditioned to prioritize others' needs and feelings over our own. It's hard to break away from this, terrifying even. But we HAVE to. We're getting killed out there, either quickly or very slowly.

This is why self-help gurus say "practice saying no", but the first step for some of us is to actually gain awareness of when we want to say no. We've pushed our own wants and needs so far down that we actually have to bring them up by force.

The first time I started speaking up, my go-to phrase was, "I'm not ok with that." It felt so strange being able to describe how I was feeling and then TO MAKE THAT KNOWN, knowing I was about to make someone unhappy. I slowly learned to be ok with "being rude". It saved my life.

No one is entitled to your agreement, your silence, your smile, your consent, your company, your body. Be rude.

Trust yourself and love yourself enough to disappoint people and be fine with it. To piss them off and be fine with it. Because you made yourself known.

This ended up being a long ass thread because I know from personal experience how useless it is to just tell someone "fight back!" when they don't know how. I hope this helps some of my sisters out there in some small way. Love y'all