a thread on becoming "money positive", or: going from art school dropout to software middle management and dabbling the stock market

growing up, I had an inexplicable, implicit distrust of money. I legitimately believed in the saying "money is the root of all evil"

I'm not sure why but it may have had to do with maturing during the '08 financial crisis or my parents both being highly independent, self-employed lower-middle-class-to-poor parents. but let me tell you: money was a bad thing, and if you had too much money, YOU had to be bad.

after all, I only ever heard bad things about money: it was hard to get, billionaires were selfish, corporations extorted people, real gifts should be valued in effort or thoughtfulness, economics was complicated or impossible to understand, I didn't know anyone wealthy

then I took on, oh, about $120k in debt from a private art school that I subsequently dropped out of, my mother injured herself and couldn't work, and suddenly I was supporting both of us, scraping by on self-taught coding skills I basically lucked into out of interest.

oh fuck

it hit me: wow, money's pretty important actually, and maybe, just maybe, if my mom had known more about money she wouldn't have let me put us into 3x more debt than our collective net worth? I was 17, had had like $200 at most, ever. I didn't know what $120,000 + interest meant

so I used my pure luck of having some shitty portfolio projects and a vague web dev skills to con my way into a $40k salary job I was EXTREMELY underqualified for. I got thrown into the deep end with (relative) underpay, tons of work, colleagues who knew more than me, a new city

I lived under the dread of knowing my mother had no insurance, could be injured again, in one fell swoop we could both be homeless. I realized that all of my problems would be solved with money, and I had to fix my shit with it otherwise we might literally die

I was lucky in that working in software, I got EXPOSED to money. I got to hear about startups, meet rich people, to hear about valuations and IPOs and equity and billions and get indoctrinated into the secret society of "people who believe making a shitton of money is possible"

and not only was it possible, but it was... fine? and everyone was both simultaneously aware that money-making was nonsensical, with perverse priorities, but also aware that their role was to exploit the system as well as they possibly could

they were completely cynical about it, but also not bad people--they just understood how the system works. and there's a LOT to be cynical about. and that isn't something to feel oppressed by, but embrace. the system isn't a person, so don't take it personally

let me tell you, it's all bullshit. companies are valued astronomically based on nonexistent revenue. equity is proportioned on handshake deals. you make $1000s more in the 2 minutes it takes you to negotiate. big companies make BILLIONS; your 6-fig salary is a pittance to them

people in tech, business, and finance probably aren't any smarter than your average twitter user. so much of it is about knowing the right words and what they mean and how to apply them; if you're not a programmer/quant/etc you MIGHT use basic algebra in a real business context

I mean this completely literally: you can succeed in business simply by fooling other people into thinking you know what you're talking about. intelligence and skill are a great leverage point, but cynically, being able to talk the talk is far more important than walking the walk

there were 4 realizations for me to become "money positive":

1) making more $ than you think is appropriate is possible
2) it isn't unethical unless you do unethical things
3) barely anybody knows what they're doing
4) the system doesn't care and neither should you

here's the thing: money is nothing more than a power multiplier. it is a HUGE enabler of goal manifestation in terms of time and material for you or others. deploy it irresponsibly, stupidly, or evilly? you get the same back. use it well? great results!

growing up without a lot of money I saw it constantly deployed around me, but often only in negative ways because that's what's sensational and makes the news. you don't hear about "noble money" because talking about money in our society is gauche (another tool of the system btw)

this can develop a complex where you think, money = bad therefore me poor / good. and if you grow up feeling oppressed/disadvantaged because of what you CAN'T do without money, you tend to develop a learned helplessness as a result, which is difficult to break

so let me tell you: it's OK to have money. it's OK to make a LOT of money, and use it. we want to push back against the privilege of "poor mindset" memes but there IS something to the "rich dad poor dad" dynamic, and many of us have money issues like we have daddy issues

I'll never tell people they just need to "think richer" because that's nonsense but the fact is your perception of what you are _allowed_ to have deeply influences what you aim for, and people often believe they're allowed to have only what the system deems them worthy of having

but let me reiterate: money is nonsense, it's made up, systems are designed to push it upwards, price inflation is steadily reducing the value of your money, and however much you think is "too much" to have is barely anything. you can, and should, GO FOR IT and ASK FOR IT

the best way I can recommend embracing money is to get fascinated with it. decide how much you'd need to retire (google "Financial Independence Retire Early"), read hypno books like Think & Grow Rich/Rich Dad Poor Dad, read The Personal MBA, understand where you are in the system

then plan your next move. let me tell you, at my peak I made Too Much Money. more money than anyone needs; in a normal world, more than enough money, but in this world, barely. don't be afraid to be greedy for yourself, just don't step on anyone's head to get to your goals.