Small thread about how quizzing as a hobby both motivates and depresses me.

This year's Tata Crucible has been a game changer as far as quizzing is concerned. Taking it online couldn't have been easy.

As someone who has been taking part in this quiz on and off since it began 15+ years ago, the event management this year has been exceptional.

Now, it is down to 12 semi-finalists (including me) from which 6 finalists and 1 National winner will be selected this Saturday.

While I enjoy quizzing, this is the part that depresses me. I know I have reached my level of incompetence. The other finalists are so good that I can right now predict, with a certain amount of confidence, who the 6 finalists will be.

In all probability, it would be
Jayakanthan
Aniruddha
Rohan
Rabi Shankar
Kapinjal
Naveen

I would add that Tanmay has a chance as well but the other 5 (including me) need to get really lucky.

And that's what depresses me about quizzing. Knowing that everyone else is so good and so beyond competition that any these guys would beat me 99 times out of 100.

Rohan would beat me 100 times out of 100.

It isn't that they are exceptionally smart or work 8 hours a day on quizzing. Nothing like that. They are just better at the game than I am.

Accepting that is hard and depressing.

Better men than I are able to either accept it or work towards being the best.

For example, Alekhya, who was a teammate 15 years ago, still quizzes but doesn't take it seriously enough that it bothers him.

Or Subrata, who won Crucible last year, admits to spending huge amount of time on prep.

Or Manas, who keeps his interest alive by making small videos.

I am unable to do any of those things and that depresses me. Neither can I just let it be, not care about it, and say - it is a hobby like watching Test Cricket.

Nor can I put in consistent effort in improving myself in this domain. I am just too lazy to do that.

Perhaps it has got to do with the whole 'Growth Mindset' Vs 'Fixed Mindset' set up.

Whatever it is that I do, I can only do it till the level that it gets hard and then I just float around that.

It is a problem. I know it is a problem. The fact that I can't do much to fix it is what saddens me.

And it is not just limited to quizzing. This is true for almost anything that I do. Be it studying in college, running a business, or even starting a YouTube channel for liquor.

What motivates me are the little things like guessing a quiz question correctly, closing a sale, solving a puzzle / math problem that I haven't seen before, trying a new Single Malt.

These small things continue to provide me joy and help me ignore the bigger picture.

And this is what I would recommend to you and to myself - keep looking for the little things of joy.

The vision document is for Japanese construction companies.

Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk. :)