A whole generation of China hands in America, myself included, dedicated lives and years to the hope that the Chinese government could perhaps become as good and wise as the people it governs. It's really hard to accept that we were wrong. It's a profound grief.

I want there to be a better superpower than the US has been. I want there to be a country that doesn't act like the US too often has. But just because I want that, doesn't mean I can fool myself into believing that China will be that better, kinder superpower.

The Chinese government isn't evil incarnate; neither is the US government of course. But I believe we are far, far past the point where anyone can hope that China will bring a better, fairer, and more just international system.

And this isn't to say China will only bring bad. The US had done a lot of good too, despite the ill we have wrought. Nothing is so simple. But I am still seeing this hope-against-hope that Beijing might be somehow better, fairer, less violent. We are past that point, friends.