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Gonna go on a rant, here. A very Anti-Christmas rant. So if you don't wanna hear it, or think arguing with me about it will do anything, just keep scrolling.
Okay?
Okay.
Rant: Why Disliking Christmas is Tantamount To Anti-Americanism, a thread.
Okay?
Okay.
Rant: Why Disliking Christmas is Tantamount To Anti-Americanism, a thread.
I've made it known I hate this holiday. I hate it down to the marrow. And I have a host of personal reasons: friends killed themselves right around this holiday; my birthday is literally two days from it and I have ALWAYS felt overshadowed, and so on.
But what really gets me?
But what really gets me?
The fucking deep corporate bullshit? The religious theft? The fact that it apes pagan tradition? Against its own original intent?
Yeah, I know, that sounds like some edgelord college lib trying to hard, right?
Look closer.
Yeah, I know, that sounds like some edgelord college lib trying to hard, right?
Look closer.
It's a well-documented fact that Christmas was deliberately shoved onto December 25th to eclipse pagan Solstice Traditions, and that many Christians celebrated Christianity and Pagan roots at the same time during this time. Not unlike All Hallows, Easter, and others.
At one point the Puritans decided to forbid all celebritory shit entirely. No dancing, no singing, and CERTAINLY no fucking Christmas tree.
That went over like a lead balloon with, like, EVERYBODY, hence why they fled to the New World.
That went over like a lead balloon with, like, EVERYBODY, hence why they fled to the New World.
Over time Puritanism died out. (And good riddance.) New melting pot traditions formed. Blends of French and German and Brit and Irish. We glommed on to pretty much whatever we happened on. Because it was fun. And IT CRIMMIS.
... but not everybody was Christian.
... but not everybody was Christian.
CRIMMIS started separating Us from Them. The Saved and the Savage. And it was totally okay because like Sacrifical Lamb to Cleanse Sins and yadda yadda.
... y'ever think hard about that? The concept of human sacrifice as a means of Salvation? Yet the Christians shit on Jews...?
... y'ever think hard about that? The concept of human sacrifice as a means of Salvation? Yet the Christians shit on Jews...?
Anyway. The more time went on, it meant even less that it was celebrating the birth of a God Child who was destined to die and more about the FEELS because Dickens wrote books and suddenly the concept of a White Christmas became a thing.
No, fucking seriously. Dickins.
No, fucking seriously. Dickins.
The White Christmas idea of snow and sleighs and shit was popularized by literature. By Brits. And we know how well they wrote about including non-white folk in their representation.
And that spawned more literary fiction that enforced it. (Night Before Christmas, for example.)
And that spawned more literary fiction that enforced it. (Night Before Christmas, for example.)
Eventually we painted ourselves into a It Snows On Crimmis And Shit corner. Fuck everybody else, I guess. And only White People were invited.
Then consumerism took off. Because thank you, Dean Martin et all.
Ever notice how fucking ALL the "modern" carols are from that era?
Then consumerism took off. Because thank you, Dean Martin et all.
Ever notice how fucking ALL the "modern" carols are from that era?
... unless you count the bullshit nauseating pop music like ALL I WANT FOR CRIMMIS IS UUUUUUU godfuckingDAMMITIhatethatsong.
Even then, that's one of... what. A dozen? At most? Like, fuckin' Feliz Navidad is at least catchy for godssake.
But suddenly the Era Of Buying.
Even then, that's one of... what. A dozen? At most? Like, fuckin' Feliz Navidad is at least catchy for godssake.
But suddenly the Era Of Buying.
Because after the Industrial Revolution and shit we had a bit more capital in our newly stolen country and by God we were gonna BUY SHIT to show our affections because Sears told us to. I mean, that's what the stories were starting to tell us, anyway. And Americans gotta one-up.
So the gifting became practically *contestual*. Bigger and better and more outdone than the last. Post WWII in the Golden Age (cough racist as fuck cough) was PRIME pickings to ramp it up HARDCORE and now you've got Us v. Them with Corporate Whore and JEEBUS WAS WHITE shit.
So now if you weren't buying shit you were easy to spot as a potential traitor to White Christian American so fuckin' EVERYBODY does it to at least fit in even if they're not Christian.
Tell me - what's your reaction if someone says "I don't celebrate Christmas"?
Tell me - what's your reaction if someone says "I don't celebrate Christmas"?
If you're under 40, probably a mix. "Oh, you're not Christian, you're against corporate consumerism, you're Jewish." Am I right?
Imagine if it was "... what's wrong with you?" And "... oh. You're *Jewish*."
... and you know damn well why I wrote it that way.
Imagine if it was "... what's wrong with you?" And "... oh. You're *Jewish*."
... and you know damn well why I wrote it that way.
So now we're so trained to buy shitty inflatable decorations that litter our lawns in Suburban America because YA GOTTA KEEP UP APPEARANCES but you don't even fucking realize that's what you're doing.
And if you don't buy your spouse something nice you're a bad partner.
And if you don't buy your spouse something nice you're a bad partner.
... you see how deep this fucking goes?
No? Just me?
Then how about I'm sick and fucking tired of CRIMMIS OMG people who literally do their shopping SIX MONTHS IN ADVANCE AND I'M NOT KIDDING while planning their tree in goddamn *August* and fuck-your-other-holidays?
No? Just me?
Then how about I'm sick and fucking tired of CRIMMIS OMG people who literally do their shopping SIX MONTHS IN ADVANCE AND I'M NOT KIDDING while planning their tree in goddamn *August* and fuck-your-other-holidays?
You know how many of those assholes exist?
*You wanna take bets on how many were as white as toilet paper?...*
Because the only motherfuckers who have ever tried to "convert" me into UWU LUB CRIMMIS all *all* fucking white.
It's a uniquely White Suburban mindset.
*You wanna take bets on how many were as white as toilet paper?...*
Because the only motherfuckers who have ever tried to "convert" me into UWU LUB CRIMMIS all *all* fucking white.
It's a uniquely White Suburban mindset.
Even if they aren't Christian. Or are "C&E" Christians. Or "non-practicing".
I've known atheists who celebrate Christmas, because that's just what you *do*.
Think about why that fucking is. Why a secular person would celebrate a supposed religious holiday.
I've known atheists who celebrate Christmas, because that's just what you *do*.
Think about why that fucking is. Why a secular person would celebrate a supposed religious holiday.
Raised with it? Just in it for the gifts? Actually likes the Gimmiepigs in the stores throwing tantrums over the last Latest Toy?
Think hard. It's not an easy answer.
But I promise, you tell a Karen you don't celebrate Christmas, they'll think you're a Satanist.
Think hard. It's not an easy answer.
But I promise, you tell a Karen you don't celebrate Christmas, they'll think you're a Satanist.
Not one Magachud out there doesn't celebrate Christmas, I can almost *promise*. Why? What is it about it that draws them to defend it, to decry the War on Crimmis?!
Why indeed.
I got off work today in the icy rain and fog. There's a park across from my work. Folk were there -
Why indeed.
I got off work today in the icy rain and fog. There's a park across from my work. Folk were there -
- a band of some kind, singing the sane fucking tired-ass Jingle Bell Rock and Let It Snow and I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas.
A crowd - small - had gathered to cheer.
... in a fucking pandemic.
Because we aren't grown-ass responsible adults. We're spoiled teens.
A crowd - small - had gathered to cheer.
... in a fucking pandemic.
Because we aren't grown-ass responsible adults. We're spoiled teens.
We think we're invincible and Crimmis is THAT special. Surely the "good cheer" is a GOOD thing?...
... tell that to the dead in January.
Can't miss a Crimmis, after all. That'd be heresy.
Not to Christ, or to God.
... but to the fucking American Dream.
... tell that to the dead in January.
Can't miss a Crimmis, after all. That'd be heresy.
Not to Christ, or to God.
... but to the fucking American Dream.
Buy. Party. Be extravagant. Sing the same tired songs and read the same books and watch the sane movies, all written by white people. And never question it, you Grinch, who do you think you are?! How dare you?!?
... fuck Christmas. The whole fucking Americanized bullshit of it.
... fuck Christmas. The whole fucking Americanized bullshit of it.
