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A MESSAGE FOR MEMBERS OF THE MEDIA — AND THE PUBLIC — ON HOW ONE COMMENT CAN MAKE A HOMICIDE SURVIVOR’S DAY ALL THE MORE DIFFICULT. Please read and share. (1/11)
Today I got a call from homicide survivor @MaureenBasnicki, whose husband Ken was working in the World Trade Center on 9/11. Today was already going to be a hard day for Maureen. (2/11)
First and foremost, today is Ken’s birthday. Two days ago, it was their wedding anniversary. Soon it will be Christmas and, before the end of the month, there will be birthdays for their son and for Maureen’s father-in-law (Ken’s father). December is full of triggers. (3/11)
As such, Maureen had prepared herself psychologically so she could face today as strong as possible. But today, when she woke up and turned on the news, one of the first things she heard was that more people died from COVID in the U.S. yesterday than from the 9/11 attacks. (4/11)
“They’re comparing the numbers to 9/11. Do you know what that did to me?” she asked. (5/11)
In case you don’t know, hearing that sort of comparison would likely be triggering for many (many, many) survivors of 9/11. Because the news report was not comparing apples to apples. Far from it. (6/11)
A virus did not kill Ken Basnicki in the World Trade Center. People did. A global pandemic has not left his family suffering nearly two decades later. The preventable, sinister actions of human beings did. (7/11)
Imagine me saying to a 9/11 survivor after my grandfather died last year, on 9/11, "I get it now." Nope. I get my own pain. I will never get theirs. (8/11)
A whole range of emotions washed over Maureen. She was disheartened. She was frustrated, “frustrated that that comparison could be made between an act of evil from mankind and a serious virus like the pandemic.” (9/11)
Perhaps that comment will not be repeated on the news today, but Maureen will likely carry the sting from it for the rest of the day, and perhaps through all the other difficult days she will face in December. (10/11)
“What people don’t understand is it’s about the grieving process,” Maureen said, “They (9/11 victims) didn’t die. They were taken away.” (11/11)
