"An initial three studies established the [Tendency for Interpersonal Victimhood] as a consistent and stable trait that involves four dimensions: moral elitism, a lack of empathy, the need for recognition, and rumination. .. https://www.psypost.org/2020/12/researchers-identify-a-new-personality-construct-that-describes-the-tendency-to-see-oneself-as-a-victim-58753
"A follow-up study further found that this tendency for victimhood is linked to anxious attachment — an attachment style characterized by feeling insecure in one’s relationships — suggesting that the personality trait may be rooted in early relationships with caregivers."
So. What has changed about early childhood care early that could be causing insecure attachment and re-emerging as neurotic behavior in adulthood?
"'Deeply rooted in the relations with primary caregivers,' the researchers describe, 'this tendency affects how individuals feel, think, and behave in what they perceive as hurtful situations throughout their lives.'"
So what happens when 6 month olds have revolving caregivers?
So what happens when 6 month olds have revolving caregivers?
We think of our society as being full of helicopter moms, but more children and infants are in extended care than ever. The intensive parenting is for a few hours a day and usually an aberration to what the child normally experiences.
We are encouraged to think a child is well-adjusted if they don't sob at drop-off, but what's happened (and let me stress this as someone who has worked & observed so many care settings) is a child learns to repress their needs.
The best caregiving relationship is usually with a nanny, but a nanny can be disappeared at any moment and that causes lifelong disruption. A nanny is also seen as a rival parent figure which can cause subtle but traumatic tension for the child.
Most children don't have nannies but paid caregivers. And let me tell you that a state-mandated ratio of 6:1 infants to caregivers is no kind of care at all. Nature does not give us sextuplets for a reason. Children need as much 1:1 attention especially when they're small.
One of our most fundamental need to be known; this goes doubly so for small children. The hurt sustained when a child learns to expect revolving care from bureaucrats who are frequently distracted by the most high-need children is life-long, and I think we see it re-emerging now.
Decades of the daycare experiment, of 5 yr olds in all-day K, of shrugging at adolescents during highly vulnerable years and handing them a smartphone - this early insecurity is re-emerging as mental illness and a desire to cancel others, just as the child's needs were ignored.
The sad truth is we do have a society of victims, but the hurt is so far back and deep, and the reason is so taboo to talk about, that we can't address it and thus end up ordering more of the poison that's hurting us.