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One of the saddest things about navigating medical fatphobia is knowing that if I want to increase my chances of proper, compassionate, thorough care, I can't bring my most supportive advocate with me because she also happens to be fat.
And I'm coming to terms w/ the fact that I may never be able to bring my PERSON to the doctor with me. The truth is that doctors just treat us differently when we have a thin person alongside us. Like they suddenly have to be respectful and hide their judgement. Because without a
thin ally present, I can feel their sense of moral superiority clouding the room. And clouding their ability to properly care for me. They do not ask follow up questions, they make overarching assumptions, and they push when I express a boundary. They disregard common signs
of things like eating disorders & trauma. They act as if we are not worth investing time in. I vividly remember the last appt I attended alongside my partner. The doctor treated us both like everything we said was uninformed; like we couldn't possibly have an accurate read on
our physical health or needs. The doctor even made a comment about how my partner should work on being healthier even though she "may never be a swimsuit model..." in which y'all know I spoke tf up about and said "she's ALREADY a swimsuit model."
I wonder how many people understand how truly dehumanizing this feels. To be seen in the eyes of a doctor as not even a whole person? Like we are unknowledgeable and a waste of time. And then to still need to beg them for their care and "expertise."
My point is, stop making it so damn hard for fat people to get the care we need. We are complex humans with a rich history of environmental, psychological, and physical factors at play and when accessing healthcare these should be considered and evaluated just like you're taught.
To need a thin person present just to be taken seriously is an indicator of a healthcare system that is actively harming 42% of people in the US. And if your core ethics are autonomy, beneficence, nonmaleficence, and justice...it would seem you are failing.
