I just had the most insane parenting moment.

Our daughter has a heart of gold and cares deeply for animals no matter how small. She was horrified the day we set out mousetraps in our new home and cried for days. So we did anything a parent would do: we lied our asses off.

We convinced our daughter that the traps were humane. They would snap and gently trap them by the hand, tail, or foot. She was too little to understand that we were at WAR. As we were right across the street from a forest and field, mice kept showing up in our house.

So traps were set, and every few months we would snag a mouse and quietly chuck him into the woods before our kid could see him. When the weather gets cold, as disgusting as this is, we'd find one in the basement every other week.

Today, however, one of the field mice made it into the house and up to the second floor. My daughter saw it dart across her room. She freaked out, so we immediately loaded some traps and forbade her from entering the room. I then went and rebaited all the traps in the basement.

Within an hour, we caught a white one in the basement and the black one I my daughter's room. I was so beyond grossed out I couldn't handle it. TWO IN ONE DAY!!! We clean and vacuum every Saturday! Ugghhghhhhh!!!! The husband ran them out to the woods, and I rebaited the traps.

I then noticed a trap was missing in the basement.

"Did you move it?" I asked the husband.

"No...you don't think we caught a third one, do you?" He said.

I nearly gagged at the thought when I saw something move under the table.

"Oh no...WE DID. AND IT IS STILL ALIVE!"

Thank God I am married to a biologist. He just casually picked up the trap.

"Huh," he said. "Would you look at that?"

From the trap dangled a perfectly healthy, robust, black mouse...caught only by his foot.

I look at the hubby. He looks at me. We run upstairs together.

"Hey daughter!" We yell. "Look! We caught the mouse!"

"Is he alive?!" She asked anxiously. The mouse wiggled, trying to free its foot.

"Whew!" She said. "Thank goodness!"

The husband went and released the mouse in the words. My daughter thanked me for buying humane traps.

I said nothing and hugged her back.

I am so going to hell.

But I will be taking a lot of these fucking mice with me, damnit!