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Education is the foundation of a properly functioning society. So when we have a large scale problem, education is our "go to" tool. Without a doubt, epidemiologists have proven to be an issue so I propose a year long re-education camp. So here we go.1/
At the onset, let it be known this won't be mandatory. But if one volunteers to decline, you won't be able to fully participate in society. Those things that bring humans pleasure will have to be restricted. Its just too risky, otherwise. 2/
It starts with a 28 day survival course where they forage off the land and learn "self reliance". It will be rough at first, we might even lose a few. But as those deaths are clearly secondary, there is no need to document them. The long term goal is a stronger herd. 3/
Each day, they will be given a prize (eg. sleeping bag, fishing rod) if they properly answer a question with two options. One built on anodyne theory grounded in anti-social behavior or a second centered on evidence based reasoning. This is where the imprinting begins. 4/
This initial step is essential to increase compliance. Now, an intensive 6 month course where the mind is nurtured with sound intellectual theory and the body challenged with a range of risk taking activities. You won't find a sociology textbook here. 5/
The principles of reason, law and humans rights will taught along side data analysis, immunology, virology and fundamental economics. Our "drills sergeants" come from all segments of society and I must say the response to this idea has been overwhelming. 6/
Risk taking activities include a rope course and a climbing wall. Those that find this too much will be asked to ride a bicycle without a helmet. At the completion of each task, volunteers will be encouraged to chant "Reason is supreme" an "Evidence based medicine rules" . 7/
The next 5 months will be dedicated to slow reintegration of epidemiologists back into society. It will be day trips at first to the local bar or perhaps a sporting event. They will be encouraged to get closer to "real" humans and even strike up conversations. 8/
We too at "Camp Normal" are worried about relapse to old behavior. So we will make sure to impose randon and arbitrary rules just when they see light at the end of the tunnel. This will certainly stiffen the spine. 9/
As they reach the end, we will allow them to recirculate in society. Don't worry, they will be asked to "mask up". If they strike an independent conversation, there's a good chance their muffled words won't be understood. A true evidence based use of masks. 10/
Upon completion, our epidemiological volunteers will be given a "passport" allowing them to attend social gatherings. Other party goers can rest easy that reeducation has taken place and relaspe behavior is low. 11/
We will make sure to "contact trace" their social interactions purely for safety reasons. Herd immunity will be maintained through a series of "booster shots" we call professional development workshops. One can never be too safe. 12/
So lets end with a poll. Is it in the best interests of a healthy society to propose reeducation camps for epidemiologists?
