Good morning, white women. Pull up a chair. We need to have a chat.

Let's just say that hypothetically you consider yourself to be left-leaning. Maybe you've got #resist in your profile. Maybe you think you're on the right side of things.

Listen up.

If, hypothetically, you're in some groups right now where there are conversations happening about how to connect with and absolve Trump supporters, I'm gonna tell you what not to do.

(I mean, first of all, I don't know why you're doing that, but stick with me)

DO NOT, under any circumstances, reach out to Black women out of nowhere and explain to them why you feel you need to forgive white racists.

DO NOT center on yourself and how much you enjoy having conversations about absolution without justice.

DO NOT say "well, three Black people were in this conversation and THEY thought it was ok, so."

DO NOT assume Black America is a monolith.

DO NOT ask Black women to absolve you of your guilt, let alone absolve Trump voters.

DO NOT assume that you can speak for folks who are the direct victims of harm by those you seek to absolve about how to "heal."

DO NOT center on your own feelings re: why you think "unity" or "connection" or "leading from love" when you don't LISTEN to Black people.

DO NOT ask Black women to absolve you of your guilt.

And DO NOT, when Black women tell you in so many far more polite words to GFY, ask them if they "hate all white people."

THIS is the problem with white liberals/progressives having convos right now about "unity": it is emboldening white people who think they're woke to CAUSE HARM.

It allows white women who prefer to feel comfortable to not have to confront their own complicity in how we got here--

--AND to keep being racist, because BY THE WAY, that's what you are when you do this.

And if you wonder why I'm saying this, it's because the Black women who you're doing this to don't feel safe enough in liberal/prog communities where it's happening TO SPEAK IT OUT LOUD,

and because your racism is a distraction from THE REAL WORK.

Oooh, I'm hot this morning. Do not do this to my friends. Do not do this.

Do not make Black women do your work. Do not ask them to forgive you and make nice. Do not tell them how much better you feel when you do it.

And if you don't know why all of this is SO WRONG, FFS don't have any more convos with Black women about race until you have educated yourself about why YOUR FEELINGS don't matter in the face of violence, murder, injustice, and 400 yrs of systemic racism OF WHICH YOU ARE A PART.

GAH. DONE. I am so sick of white women and our bullshit. I am so angry about how much harm we continue to cause because we like to be comfortable instead of accountable.

I am so tired of handmaidens to white supremacy.

Stop fucking harming my friends.

/end