So 2020 has been a year in which I've been meticulously tracking and cultivating daily habits. My newest habit has been to log a compliment I receive each day, and to log the successes/achievements I reach. I want to talk about how it's already changed my outlook. (thread) 1/

After reading @JamesClear's Atomic Habits, and realizing how much of our daily energy is spent on autopilot, I decided to better-shape my auto-piloting. This has been absolutely CRUCIAL in 2020. There were days when mental health didn't allow much else.
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So each month, I create a habit log, an on-paper spreadsheet in a notebook I also use for my journaling habit. After I perform a habit, I color in that habit's cell. At then end of each month, I reassess my habits: adding new ones and discarding ones that I've outgrown. 3/

This month's habits were to:
1. Log a compliment I receive each day, 1 personal and 1 professional.
2. Log all successes and achievements that day, personal and professional.

We'll talk about compliments first. 4/

For better or worse, I'm a person who thrives on external validation. I started this thinking it would just be a silly ego boost, something to boost my mood in 2020, something I can look back on to bring a smile and remember that people like me when I'm lonely. 5/

I made a spreadsheet with dates & columns for personal and professional, and decided to fill them in as I got a compliment, with a moment to reflect scheduled as part of my end-of-day ritual. And on Day 1, when I stopped to reflect, I realized I hadn't received any compliments 6/

I'm sure my partners gave me compliments today, I thought. I scrolled through texts. They had, in fact, but I'd done what I normally do and glazed over them. So the personal column was fine. I realized I needed to try to be better at hearing them, but I knew that already. 7/

But I knew I hadn't gotten any professional compliments. My workday consists largely of self-directed work. Where in the world had I been expecting a professional compliment to come from EVERY DAY? But I realized this was an opportunity to compliment myself. So i did. 8/

And that act--complimenting myself--changed everything, but not in the way I expected. I figured it would just give me practice focusing on being kinder to myself. But more profoundly, in that moment, I became my own safety net. 9/

Now my daily flow was:
1. Try to become better at hearing compliments. Write them down right away.
2. Reflect when you're not hearing them. Are they there and you're not seeing them?
3. If they're really not there, support yourself. You got this. 10/

I knew that I didn't want this to become a log of just positive self-talk (there's nothing wrong with that, I'd just prob make a separate habit for it), so on Day 2 I actually noticed when people gave me compliments. But also, I felt myself complimenting others more. 11/

Now on Day 5, I had another solitary day, no compliments in one of the columns. And zero sadness about it. In 5 days I can feel myself becoming more resilient, more aware of others trying to connect with me, and more happy with the positive energy I'm giving to loved ones. 12/

The second habit, logging successes/achievements has had a similar journey. This practice was designed to complement the first: logging compliments provides external validation, and recognizing my own achievement is the counterpart for internal validation. 13/

Friends, it has been A WEEK. And on that same first day, I struggled to find a win, personal or professional. But I sat for several mins reviewing my day until I finally settled for "Got (person) excited about (work thing)". Was that really all I'd accomplished? 2020 feels. 14/

Day 2 was even worse. I had one of the worst days I've had in months. I didn't work. My professional "win" for the day was literally "Made it through the day." But personal was kicking up a bit. Things like holding boundaries, doing difficult self-examination, self-soothing. 15/

Realizing how badly I needed time off, I scheduled Day 3 off. But surprisingly, after my personal wins on Day 2, I realized I wanted to get SOMETHING done, just a little task I could celebrate. I had a shockingly productive half-day. 16/

On that day, I listed lots of professional wins, and included my time off among them. I also had lots of personal wins including "remembered I am strong". The list has grown every day since. 16/

And to be clear, the length of each day's list of wins is not actually correlated to my productivity or output each day. It's because more and more, I'm able to recognize my own contributions--to my own work, to my team, and to myself. 17/

And we're only on Day 5! So yeah, I'm very excited to see where these habits take me next. But they are certainly two of the most impactful habits I've adopted in 2020, and I'm always excited for reflection and growth. 18/

And I truly can't recommend Atomic Habits enough. It's among the 5 or so books I can honestly say directly and tangibly changed my life.

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Thanks for reading. I'm grateful for every single one of you. 19/19