All right, by request, How To Have Pneumonia. I'm tagging all my advice stuff #AuntieJulie so there's that. Evidently people had the last thread bookmarked when my account went down in flames, so we're going to go over it again.

In the weird good/bad zone we've been in for the last year, thanks to #COVID I don't really have to get into it any more that this is potentially a major health issue and you should take it very seriously. But it is, and you should.

I'm one of the lucky few who has the kind of asthma when the alveoli spasm on EXHALE, so I can breathe in just fine - I can't clear my lungs. And so with all the excess goo, they act just like a petri dish when I breathe in a germ. Yours can do that too.

First thing, of COURSE, is go to a doctor and do what they tell you. Take it seriously. (Gotta say it.) Stop on your way home and stock up on books and liquids, and anything else you need to stay in bed for a week (or more).

(When I started listening to my doctor I started recovering in half to a quarter of the time it took me when I was "toughing it out".)

Rest. Really rest. Hanging out in your house/apartment doesn't count as rest. Laying in bed, sleeping all you can and reading quietly the rest of the time, is resting. If it's pneumonia, you'll be tired anyway. Listen to your body for once.

Unless you are one of the few in America who really has trouble keeping weight on (in which case, TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR), you can spare a few days if you don't feel like eating. But swig down all the liquids you can stand. It loosens the goo in your lungs.

Water, Pedyalite, vitamin water, jello watered down (Mom's favorite), whatever. Stay away from booze and keep the caffeine as minimal as possible; your body needs liquid to process alcohol and caffeine out, and it needs the liquid for other stuff.

A very good trick to know is "Postural Drainage and Percussion", a technique developed for people with cystic fibrosis but works for the rest of it. It will loosen the goo in your lungs and aid drainage. It has saved me more than one hospital stay. https://www.cff.org/Life-With-CF/Treatments-and-Therapies/Airway-Clearance/Basics-of-Postural-Drainage-and-Percussion/

If possible (I know this is a pipe dream, given current events), our last factor is stress. If you can avoid it? It'll help. I don't know why or how, but just having a pillow fort and sleeping and reading and drinking, it's like a cocoon.

So there you go. Rest, drink lots of liquids, rest, get your torso thumped by someone trustworthy, and rest. It sounds stupid. It seems like at this point we've put men on the moon, we should have a better plan. We don't. Rest.

Take care, the end.

DERP! I forgot the other part. (Thanks LBeamPDX). If this happens a couple times, TALK TO YOUR DOCTOR about getting a pneumonia vaccine. They are the shit. They are the best vaccine ever. I went from pneumonia several times a year to once every couple years, maybe.

And the best part? One of the "side effects" (FDA, you fuckwits) is that it can reduce sinus infections. I HAVEN'T HAD ONE IN YEARS. I used to have one a year: from October to May.

And Lesley adds, sleeping propped up can help too. Read comments, lots of good stuff. The end!