Here's my contribution to Threadapalooza's 2020 kickoff

A History of the World in 100 Objects

In 2010, the @britishmuseum published the greatest podcast of all time

It told the history of the world through 100 objects in their collection

An absolute must listen

Since podcasts don't have images

Here's every single item from the list, along with a fascinating tidbit

1. Mummy of Hornedjitef

The inside of his coffin is decorated with inscriptions of spells, images of gods who act as protectors, and constellations of stars - a personal star map.

2. Olduvai Stone Chopping Tool

This 2 million year old tool allowed early humans to eat bone marrow, which is the most nutritious part of the carcass.

Bone marrow is so valuable because we didn't have to compete for it - only a few other animals can eat it.

3. Olduvai Handaxe

When you create a handaxe, it lights up the parts of your brain used for speech.

Whoever created this tool would have had the language abilities of a modern-day 7 year old.

4. Swimming Reindeer

Carving these animals required an incredibly intimate knowledge of reindeer

It's so detailed, we can tell it was done during the fall - during their rutting and migration season

5. Clovis Spear Point

The ripples on this spear point are beautiful, but deadly.

They cause intense bleeding no matter where you hit. The blood loss weakens the animal so you can eventually finish it off.

6. Bird Shaped Pestle

Thousands of years ago the plants we ate were borderline inedible, even poisonous

Other animals were more efficient at eating the tastiest, nutritious bits

We used cooking to carve out an evolutionary niche

7. Ain Sakhri Lovers

This is the oldest known representation of a couple having sex

And if you view it from different angles, it represents both male and female genitalia

8. Egyptian Clay Model of Cattle

When humans first domesticated cows, we hadn't yet developed lactose tolerance.

The early Egyptians likely tapped the cows' blood - either drinking directly, or adding to stews for extra protein.

9. Maya Maize God Statue

In Mayan mythology, the maize god was decapitated at harvest time but reborn again at the beginning of a new growing season

Just like the harvest

10. Jomon Pot

I originally thought pots were only useful as a way to store water

But they might have been more valuable as a way to keep insects and pests out of food

11. King Den's Sandal Label

This label identified one of the earliest pharaohs as he made his way into the afterlife

Shoes have been used to show status for thousands of years

12. Standard of Ur

This is the first object that used more than one material

The lapis lazuli came from Afghanistan, the red marble from India, and the shells from the Persian Gulf

13. Indus Seal

The Indus Valley Civilization remains a mystery - we still can't read the markings on this seal.

Our knowledge of history is often based on burial sites. Since we haven't found any, it's likely they cremated their dead.

14. Jade Axe

This axehead was created 5000 years ago, and found near Canterbury England

Researchers were able to track its origins

Not just to a quarry in the Italian Alps, but to the exact boulder

15. Early Writing Tablet

Much like modern startups, the Mesopotamians were partially paid in beer

This tablet details how much the workers should receive

16. Flood Tablet

Before this tablet, the flood story was believed to only be from the Bible

When the first English scholar read it in 1872, he was so excited that he started running around the room, taking his clothes off

17. Rhind Mathematical Papyrus

Since papyruses are extremely sensitive to humidity and light, they're stored in a special room

It's dry, stuffy, and dark... the exact conditions of an Egyptian tomb

18. Minoan Bull Leaper

This sculpture comes from Rethymnon, a town on the north side of Crete

People are still doing this in France and Spain - check out the QTs for a video

19. Mold Gold Cape

When the burial site was discovered in 1833, they saved the gold but not the body

Leaving us with a mystery - why is it built for a small slim person, not a warrior chieftain?

20. Statue of Ramesses II

This was by far the largest Egyptian sculpture the British public had ever seen, inspiring these famous lines from Shelley

"My name is Ozymandias, king of kings:
Look on my works, ye Mighty, and despair!"

21. Lachish Reliefs

The Assyrians were the first to conquer the Middle East

Their campaign against the Kingdom of Judah displaced 200k people, making these reliefs an early depiction of refugees

22. Sphinx of Taharqo

In 728 BC, the traditional balance of power flipped when the Kingdom of Kush conquered Egypt

This only lasted for ~150 years, but produced striking works of art that were a mix of African faces and Egyptian styles

23. Chinese Zhou Ritual Vessel

An inscription inside the bowl tells us its story - it was made after a great victory, but also as a sacred vessel to honor a late father

No bamboo or paper writing survives from this period, so these inscriptions are all we have left

24. Paracas Textile

Because Andean civilizations prized textile craftsmanship over stone and metal, relatively few artifacts survived

25. Gold Coin of Croesus

The story of coins is actually a story of technology

Before coins, we had no need to purify gold

But as soon as the Lydians created coins, we immediately searched for (and found) a way to create pure gold

26. Oxus Chariot Model

Details on this Persian figure are invisible to us

-The passenger wears a stylish, expensive overcoat

-The relief on the front of the chariot is an Egyptian God, Bes

-They're wearing clothes from NW Iran, but the figure was found in NE Afghanistan

27. Parthenon Sculpture: Centaur and Lapith

The most astounding part of Greek sculpture is how lifelike it is

It took millenia before painting was similarly accurate

And most other civilizations had some sort of stylized art

How did the Greeks figure it out?

28. Basse-Yutz Flagons

We have no written records of the ancient Northern Europeans (except shit-talking from the Greeks)

But the incredible detail on these objects shows they weren't barbarians

29. Olmec Stone Mask

These masks are the only indication we have of what the Olmecs might have looked like

Any skeletons would have dissolved in the acid soil of the rainforest

30. Chinese Bronze Bell

These bells weren't just musical instruments

The amount of bronze used for each of these bells was so highly regulated, local communities could use them as weights and measures

31. Coin with Head of Alexander

Alexander's conquests were first bankrolled by the rich gold and silver mines of Thrace

He then conquered Persia, capturing 5 million kilos of gold

32. Pillar of Ashoka

Ashoka started his reign by killing his brothers and waging a violent war

But this affected him deeply, and he found religion

This fragment is from his 'Sixth Pillar Edict,' declaring he will bring happiness to all of his subjects, regardless of class

33. Rosetta Stone

This boring document on tax concessions is the most visited object in the British Museum

34. Chinese Han Lacquer Cup

Lacquer comes from a specific kind of tree sap

The sap is dangerous because it has the same oily irritant as poison ivy - but that chemical is also what makes lacquerware beautiful

35. Head of Augustus

A Sudanese queen captured a series of Roman forts in southern Egypt, and brought this head back to Meroë

She buried it under the steps of a temple dedicated to victory, so that everyone would literally be crushing the Roman Emperor under their feet

36. Warren Cup

uhhh..... you better ask your parents about this one!

37. North American Otter Pipe

Tobacco was originally smoked by wrapping it in the leaves of other plants

As it made its way north, the cold winters (and a seasonal lack of fresh leaves) forced a switch to pipes

38. Ceremonial Ballgame Belt

In one of the Meso-American creation myths, two twins played ball with the lord of death

When Aztecs took to the court, they were living out the spiritual conflict between life and death

39. Admonitions Scroll

Emperor Xiaowu told his favorite consort, "Now that you are 30, it's time I exchanged you for someone younger."

He was joking, but she still murdered him that evening.

To remind everybody how to behave, the greatest artist illustrated the greatest poem.

40. Hoxne Pepper Pot

The Hoxne Hoard was buried in England by a wealthy Roman family around AD 400

In 1992, a farmer lost a hammer. Searching for it with a metal detector, he stumbled upon this treasure

Both the hammer and the artifacts are now in the British Museum

41. Seated Buddha from Gandhara

At first, Buddha was represented through symbols - the tree under which he achieved enlightenment, a set of footprints, etc

It wasn't until hundreds of years after his death that he was represented in human form

42. Gold Coins of Kumaragupta I

The horse on this coin depicts the Ashvamedha

A stallion was released into the wild. An escort of princes followed it, prevented it from mating

At the end of the year, the horse was captured and killed in front of the king

43. Plate showing Shapur II

Through this symbolic killing of a wild deer, the king is imposing divine order on demonic chaos

Unlike other items, this isn't just propaganda. Shapur II successfully ruled from when he came of age until his death at 70

44. Hinton St Mary Mosaic

For the first few centuries of Christianity, it was inconceivable to depict Jesus in art

This changed as the Romans adopted Christianity, and wanted to see Jesus as they could see their old gods

45. Arabian Bronze Hand

This bronze hand was offered to an Arabian god

In the 370s, the local economy collapsed. Roman converts to Christianity no longer needed frankincense to worship

Multiple religions tried to fill the vacuum, until Islam took hold in 628

46. Gold Coins of Abd Al-Malik

In only 50 years, Arabian armies conquered the Middle East. Islam spread 10x faster than Christianity or Buddhism.

This coin is the first depiction of a Muslim. But only one year later, human imagery was removed from coins and the public sphere.

47. Sutton Hoo Helmet

This treasure radically changed how we thought of the Dark Ages

Before it was discovered, historians thought of them as a lost period - devoid of culture and wealth

48. Moche Warrior Pot

The Moche made some dank-ass pots

The second one shows defeated warriors being thrown off a cliff

49. Korean Roof Tile

This tile marks the shift between thatched and tiled roofs

Along with being a status symbol, tiled roofs helped prevent the greatest threat to ancient cities

Fire

50. Silk Princess Painting

Once upon a time, a princess lived in a land of silk

Her father, the emperor, decided she must marry the king of the distant land of jade

The princess smuggled the secret of silk to her new land, hiding everything in her headdress

51. Maya Relief of Royal Blood-letting

In this sculpture, the queen is pulling a rope with thorns through her tongue

This pain would, after ritual preparation, send her into a visionary trance

52. Harem Wall-painting Fragments

Not much survives from the Abbasid era in Baghdad, because the Mongols destroyed the city in 1258

The Mongols also caused a decline in farming. They destroyed canals, and the depopulated country couldn't maintain the remaining ones

53. Lothair Crystal

Rock crystal cannot be chiseled because it is so incredibly hard

To make this, an artisan ground out the images with abrasive powder

54. Statue of Tara

This Sri Lankan sculpture is 3/4th life size

Her right hand is in the gesture of granting a wish - potentially connected to her symbolic role of guiding us to enlightenment

55. Chinese Tang Tomb Figures

Between 750 and 907, the Abbasid Empire and the Tang Dynasty created a single market for luxury goods stretching from Morocco to Japan

Europe was an undeveloped backwater, a patchwork of small kingdoms and precarious communities

56. Vale of York Hoard

Vikings went much farther than the North Sea

Kiev was a great Viking city, and they would capture people throughout Eastern Europe to sell as slaves

This treasure includes coins from Samarkand, Baghdad, and Afghanistan

57. Hedwig Beaker

In the Middle Ages, Hedwig was a saint who could turn water into wine

This glass, which she allegedly used to perform the miracle, was actually crafted in the coastal Levant

58. Japanese Bronze Mirror

The modern mirror didn't come into use until the 16th century

Early mirrors, like this bronze one, would be polished until you could see your face in it

59. Borobudur Buddha Head

Climbing the steps of Borobudur parallels the path to enlightenment

At the bottom, carvings illustrate the disappointments of daily life

At the top, they show the Buddha, meditating and teaching

60. Kilwa Pot Sherds

The beach in this Tanzanian town has pieces of pottery that are Chinese and Arabic

Madagascar speaks an Indonesian language

Trade routes have tied the Indian Ocean together for centuries

61. The Lewis Chessmen

Instead of rooks, this chess set has Berserkers

Warriors who went without armor, bit their shields, and were as mad as hounds or wolves

62. Hebrew Astrolabe

This astrolabe comes from a time in Spain when Christianity, Judaism, and Islam co-existed

Even though the letters are all Hebrew, many of the words they spell out are Arabic or Spanish

63. Ife Head

This discovery drastically changed Europe's view of African history and culture

It demonstrated that Africa has its own great artistic and cultural traditions

64. The David Vases

Marco Polo had no word to describe these exquisite Chinese vases

He called them porcellana - Italian for 'little piglet' - which is a slang term for cowry shells

We've called it porcelain ever since

65. Taino Ritual Seat

The Taino stretched across the Caribbean

They were wiped out after a century of European contact, but many of their words survived

Barabicu - sacred fire pit
Hurakan - god of the storm
Tuna - a type of fish

66. Holy Thorn Reliquary

This reliquary houses a single thorn from the Crown of Thorns

It's impossible to know if it actually pierced the head of Christ

But this type of buckthorn still grows around Jerusalem

67. Icon of the Triumph of Orthodoxy

In the 800s, the Byzantines were losing to the Muslims. They worried it was because of religious images

A police officer climbed a ladder to remove an image of Christ

St. Theodosia (lower left) pushed the ladder away, killing him

68. Shiva and Parvati Sculpture

One of the surprises of the British Museum is occasionally finding offerings of flowers or fruit, reverently placed in front of Hindu sculptures

Religious objects don't lose their sacred power when they move into a secular museum

69. Sculpture of Huastec Goddess

It's easy to gloss over the idea of fertility goddesses, to forget why they were worshipped

Dying during childbirth used to be 100x more likely

70. Hoa Hakananai'a Easter Island Statue

The shape and style of these statues comes from the islanders' tools

When you're working with hard stone, and only have stone tools, you can't do detail

Everything has to be big

71. Tughra of Suleiman the Magnificent

This was at the top of all important official documents - Suleiman issued around 150,000 of them during his reign

The Sultan's name is in Arabic, but the words below are in Turkish

72. Ming Banknote

The ability to convince others to believe in something they can't see, but wish to be true, is a trick that has been effective throughout history

In related news, #Bitcoin hit 20k today babyyyyyyy

73. Inca Gold Llama

Around 500 years ago, the empire of the Incas was the largest in the world - bigger than Ming China, bigger than Ottoman Turkey

It ran on Llama Power

74. Jade Dragon Cup

This cup was owned by Ulugh Beg - a famous astronomer from Samarkand

He catalogued just under a thousand stars, and for that feat a crater on the Moon is named after him

75. Dürer's Rhinoceros

A rhinoceros was brought from India to Portugal, but Dürer never saw it

He carved this woodcut from a sketch sent to him

And his creation was seen by millions of Europeans

76. Mechanical Galleon

Starting in the early 1500s, the Holy Roman Empire was elected by a select group of elites

They would use the process to enrich themselves through bribes

Both the Emperor and the electors are on the deck of this ship

77. Benin Plaque: The Oba with Europeans

The figures on the sides are wearing belts hung with small crocodile heads

Those crocodile heads were the emblem authorizing them to do business with the Europeans

78. Double Headed Serpent

The snake was important for the Aztecs as a symbol of regeneration and resurrection

(this is my favorite object in the series)

79. Kakiemon Elephants

In Thailand, white elephants were a sign of power

But they were a mixed blessing - if a king gave you one, they were expensive to keep and you couldn't use them for work

Giving us the phrase "white elephant"

80. Pieces of Eight

These coins were the first global currency

Within 25 years of their first minting, they had spread across Asia, Europe, Africa, and the Americas

81. Shi'a Religious Parade Standard

Iran became Shi'a around the same time England became Protestant

82. Miniature of a Mughal Prince

The Mughal Empire stretched from Afghanistan to Bangladesh

Unlike other Muslim rulers, their empire was overwhelmingly non-Muslim

At least 75% were Hindu, along with more who followed Buddhism and Jainism

83. Shadow Puppet of Bima

The Bima puppet's black face expresses inner calm and serenity

Villains were colored red, for vindictiveness and cruelty

84. Mexican Codex Map

This map represents an area of Tlaxcala

Their residents bitterly resented Aztec rule

Which might explain why so many families on the map show marriages between Spanish settlers and native aristocrats

85. Reformation Centenary Broadsheet

The first modern centenary celebration was organized in Germany

Celebrating 100 years since Martin Luther nailed his theses to the door

86. Akan Drum

This is the first African-American object in the British Museum

It was made in Africa, then brought to America with the slave trade

87. Hawaiian Feather Helmet

When Cook arrived, he was given a grand reception and a helmet like this

He had to return a month later after a storm. But this time, already fraying tensions reached a breaking point

Cook was killed as he walked along Kealakekua Bay

88. North American Buckskin Map

This map represents territory the British won in the Seven Years War

The deer was killed by a top-notch hunter. Looking at the entry and exit wounds, the musket ball almost certainly pierced the deer's heart

89. Australian Bark Shield

This shield was dropped by an Aboriginal Australian on the first day that Captain Cook sailed into Botany Bay

90. Jade Bi

This bi (pronounced "bee") was more than 3,000 years old when a Qing emperor decided to inscribe his own words into it

The Emperor believed they were bowl stands, and paired it with another object

91. Ship's Chronometer from HMS Beagle

These chronometers allowed sailors to keep time on ships

This was useful for comparing local high noon with the clock, allowing them to calculate how far west or east they were

92. Early Victorian Tea Set

The Brits didn't just tax American tea - they also taxed their own!

In the 1770s, taxes were so high that most tea was smuggled into Britain

93. Hokusai's The Great Wave

The original woodblock continued making prints until it showed signs of wear - likely around 5,000 copies

The price of each sheet was fixed at 16 mon - the equivalent of a double helping of noodles

94. Sudanese Slit Drum

This drum was captured by Horatio Herbert Kitchener

Famous for appearing in a WWI recruitment poster

95. Suffragette-defaced penny

Reforming British democracy was a slow process

In the 1880s, only 60% of men had the right to vote

In 1918, British women over 30 won the right to vote

96. Russian Revolutionary Plate

This plate was originally blank, with a mark on the opposite side for Tsar Nicholas II

Twenty years later, a Soviet factory painted the front

They left the Tsar's mark because it was designed to be exported - sold as a collector's item

97. Hockney's In the Dull Village

This drawing is from 1966

A year later, England and Wales decriminalized sexual activity between men

98. Throne of Weapons

This chair was made in 2001, from weapons used in Mozambique's civil war

It was part of a peace project to reduce the amount of guns in the country

More than 600,000 weapons have been relinquished

99. Credit Card

In the 1990s, Argentinian currency became worthless

Some villages used IOUs

To solve problems of trust, they would bring the IOU to the local priest and ask him to endorse it

100. Solar-powered Lamp and Charger

These tools can bring light, and power for mobile phones, to over a billion people

In South Africa, laborers, farmers, and prostitutes all reported big boosts to income from mobile access

Appendix

If an object had too many interesting facts, I created a separate thread and QT'd the original

They're all here in their own thread https://twitter.com/tjrwriting/status/1341437566176927745