Your child is not your identity and vice versa. And just bc you have a child does not automatically mean they will/should love you unconditionally.

Very frustrating that we project these sorts of expectations on kids.

There is a diff in expressing emotions in a healthy way with your kid’s and forcing them to be your emotional crutch. I’ve talked about this several times.

Anyways people are weird and controlling when it comes to parenthood.

People either fully expect the child to comfort them emotionally or they dont show any emotion at all lol and neither is healthy

It’s the idea that kids are property which leads to this sort of dynamic. Just bc you give birth and provide for a child doesn’t make them your property nor does it entitle you to them.

But ofc everyone wants control so they brainwash these kids anyways leading to...

...codependency, enmeshment and Narcisstic fleas. The society we live in makes a lot of sense when you look at indoctrination of kids into these types of power dynamics.

I’m dedicated to growth but that doesn’t mean I won’t make mistakes in parenting. And there’s always a chance my child won’t reciprocated “unconditional” love and that’s okay.

My job as a parent is to guide and provide, not control their feelings or livelihood, or choices.

Everyone wants to be loved and if I were to exp that rejection it would hurt immensely but I also feel like this sense of entitlement in families is a big part of the problem, and healing innate codependency issues will create better dynamics naturally and avoid that rejection.

I guess what I’m trying to say is that this emotional expectation projected onto our kids keeps us from furthering our own healthy growth and leads to toxic dynamics. If we focused on healing our wounds, on fostering the connection instead of forcing it, we’d be in a better spot.

Just like you have to put in work to make an adult relationship work, you have to put in work to foster a relationship with your child