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Calling in the call out culture. I saw someone screenshot an image of someone who AGREED w/her yet schooled her publicly when the person suggested civil engagement over nastiness might attract more people to her view. Shamed her for all to see. https://www.nytimes.com/2020/11/19/style/loretta-ross-smith-college-cancel-culture.html
I've wondered how it's gotten to a place where people are so easily exhausted by a difficult conversation. When "trigger" is overused, it undermines authentic trauma triggering. Prof Ross says "Calling out assumes the worst. Calling in involves conversation, compassion, context."
"Its characteristics include presumption of guilt (w/out facts or nuance getting in the way); essentialism(when criticism of bad behavior becomes criticism of a bad person); pseudo-intellectualism (proclaiming one’s moral high ground); unforgivability (no apology is good enough)"
I work w/people in conflict and have a rough understanding of how the brain reacts when attacked publicly & often have thought when scrolling,
"Don't drive people away from your position not because of your position but because they think you're self righteous and insufferable"
"Don't drive people away from your position not because of your position but because they think you're self righteous and insufferable"
This week, 3 different parents lamented how at Thanksgiving they were lectured by their adult children. All 3 parents are progressive (but not enough for their kids). I worry it drives people away from causes that matter. Shaming makes people resistant to change.
Prof Ross is clear she is "sharply critical of is punching down, calling out people who have less power than you simply because you can get away with it. But there is a very strategic use of punching up.”
I disagreed w/my father but stayed in relationship. I respected him, asked him about himself, understood the context of his story. I shared why I believed the way I did & was open abt my view. He's gone now. I've no regrets as I didn't burn bridges that didn't need to be burned
