Short thread about this beautiful memoir by @ben_watt, which I finally felt ready to read six years after it came out:

The other night I talked to @herdyshepherd1 & @kathrynaalto as part of their Friendly Little Writing School. I tried to explain how writers must learn to pay close attention to the texture of things as they are in each moment, not as they were yesterday, or as they 'should' be.

I said that this process must be finely balanced between the false assumption of objectivity ('how I feel/what I see is normal, or simply reality, and is the same for everyone') and the reverse, a kind of narcissism ('nobody else sees or feels things the way I do!')

And this process of discerning and balancing both difference and commonality isn't just about becoming a better writer, it's about becoming a better human, with greater sympathies and less judgement. (Which is NOT to say all good writers are good humans, by any means.)

Perhaps I'm saying nothing more than Joyce's 'In the universal is contained the particular' – but a writer must be able tell the difference between the two in order to deploy either. And that means paying close, KIND attention to yourself and your reality, AND to other people.

Anyway, Romany And Tom is the book I had in mind while I was doing that Zoom interview, because I'd been reading it earlier that day; there are many others too (novels and n/f) that are full of the texture of lived truth, the tiny, precious detonations of meaning and feeling.

And that kind of truth is the result of getting into the habit of asking yourself, all the time, as you move through the world, 'What is this really, truly LIKE? And why is it like this for me and not you?' – which sounds simple, but isn't, and in fact can be pretty unbearable.

I often think about this moment from Family Guy, when Brian barks all night, and it turns out what the dogs are saying to one another is simply 'Hey, I'm a dog!' 'I'm a dog too!'

Because – and don't laugh – isn't that what art is? Us saying 'I'm a human'?

Reaching out in the dark to each other, to know we're not alone?

And when it works, it's miraculous, it's one of the best things humans can do. And it can be a form of time-travel! You can read Anna Karenina, for example, and experience the shiver of recognition, of truth. Not just from Russia, but from 150 years ago.

So: pay close, KIND attention to your own reality, and to other people. And it must be kind, because otherwise you'll judge others and lie to yourself to escape your own censure, and then you won't get to the truth of what things are really like.

And now I must go out and chop some wood for tonight's fire before the heavens open. <FIN>