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Listening to @itsgabrielleu ‘s book #WereGoingToNeedMoreWine (really enjoying it) & there’s a chapter where, while 15/16, one of her friends became pregnant. So they, her group of friends, raised money for her abortion. W/O the knowledge of anyone’s parents. They cut class...
...and went to Planned Parenthood with her. I thought...what an amazing & beautiful story about girlhood. Sisterhood. I don’t think I’ve ever heard a story like this. Most stories about young girls needing abortions are filled with shame. Embarrassment. But here were these...
...group of girls, caring for each other. Where all of the parents failed to properly teach their girls about sex (and this was the consequence) they stepped up & became this girl’s support in a way, adults never could. Gabby also (on her way out) grabbed a bunch of condoms.
And told her friends (who were too embarrassed to take them...even tho they were sexually active) that she had them AND TO ASK WHEN THEY NEEDED THEM. Wow. What an amazing story. I feel like when talking about young girl’s sexuality (espc Black girls) we get sidetracked by...
...thoughts of assault. Of rape. Of unwillingness or them being “taken advantage of”. Which absolutely happens. But what if, a young girl in HS, likes a kid the same age? Are those convos allowed? Even now in 2020? I surely hope so. She even goes into how she talks to young...
...girls now. I’m talking older middle schoolers/highschool so relax lol. About reciprocation. How, if you like someone & want to explore...guess what? They should also be just as excited about PLEASING YOU. Really interesting & also something for parents to think about. We’ve...
...been conditioned to see female sexuality as non-existent or something “done to” a girl/woman/femme. And rape culture IS REAL. But also, teen boys aren’t *only* experimenting/having sex with each other lol. *Another convo a lot of ppl aren’t ready for but need to be* lol.
And if we want to “even the sexual playing field” & dismantle rape culture, that HAS to come with sexual freedom, education & liberation. That also comes with unlearning the misogyny we were ALL taught. ESPC from other women in our lives. Callin 5yr old Black girls fast, etc.
Anyway, it got me to thinking. I’ve seen SO MANY scenes in tv/film where dad’s give their boy’s condoms. Maybe even go into detail about pregnancy & respect, etc. It’s really based on *pleasure*. But have we EVER seen a scene where EITHER parent has that same talk...
...to their girl/femme child that *isn’t* based in fear of pregnancy, shame of “being labeled” whatever but is SOLEY based on pleasure? Making sure the experience is enjoyed by her as well? I don’t think we have. This isn’t even going into LGBTQ/non-Binary sex talks
Parents have a hard enough time even acknowledging that hetero sex is happening. Anyway, really enjoying this book
Also? This is coming from someone whose mother put her on the pill the day after she met my boyfriend at 15/16. And ya know what? She was a smart woman lol.
