I am once again lovingly telling my querying marginalized authors to remember that this is your career and your books.

I know we feel intimidated by agents, but this is a partnership on both sides and you need to remember your own rights and authority here. (1)

You have every right to dig deep into the history of the agent you are querying, or contemplating querying, or may have your manuscript right now.

Google. QueryTracker. Look up client interviews. (2)

Some key words I suggest:

"former client"
"scandal"

You have every right to back off if you see anything that makes you worry about your future with them. You HAVE A RIGHT TO WITHDRAW FROM CONSIDERATION. (3)

I have now done this three times with friends who were shy of telling agents they had a bad feeling about that they no longer wanted them to read their full.

I can come up with viable and polite reasons, if you want. But you have that right. Use that right. (4)

Ask all the questions you can think of. If you have to, after the Call, schedule a follow-up call if you have any more. This is what @MissDahlELama encouraged me to do when I needed more information on my agent but felt shy to schedule another call. I did and it went great. (5)

I also encourage you to follow your instinct. Your instinct really does not steer you wrong and I know that, on a personal note, my instinct helped avoid what probably would have been the biggest mistake of my life (signing with a persistent agent who imploded their career). (6)

Remember that friends can be INCREDIBLY helpful and I urge you to be open with people you trust and who may have more knowledge on querying about difficulties you are having, but this is, once again, your career first and foremost. It ultimately falls to you. (7)

I'm just going to repeat the previous point again: be open with your friends because...uh...I didn't do that as soon as I should have and made things more difficult for myself as a published author querying than it could have been. (Thanks to the friends who know.) (8)

This is a "your mileage may vary" advice so take it as you will but really, curating my list of agents I was querying after research and observation saved me so much heartache. Every person on my list was someone I was happy to work with and I KNEW walked the talk. (9 1/2)

I deliberately prioritized agents of color, esp. women of color, and for those who weren't, I chose people who friends were happy with, who I saw stand up for what was right, and who had plenty of clients of color who seemed to be or could confirm they were treated right. (9 1/2)

(I also picked agents who knew how loud I am on social media because one of my greatest fears since I first started opening my mouth was being shamed or mistreated by an agent for saying something about diversity or about publishing, but that's...again, situational.)

Bottom line to all this? You need to put yourself first. No exceptions. Don't think, "I know them and I will disappoint them by not querying."

I still love and respect several I ended up not querying because I know we are good friends but wouldn't be good business partners. (10)

Prioritize what you need. It's hard, particularly when you may be fresh to publishing, to know WHAT you want (if you asked me when I was younger, I probably would have said "cool-seeming agent who reps [cool author]) but focus on what your style, goals and needs are. (11)

This is constantly said but it is so, so true:

No agent is better than a bad agent.

I survived unagented with some difficulty and I definitely don't recommend contracts and rights if you have the option of a good agent, but I've seen friends suffer through the bad. (12)

Really, I may be saying the same thing over and over, but I want you to feel confident in doing your due diligence and protecting yourself. I want you to have a long, fruitful career with someone who actually champions you and believes in your work and wants your success. (13)

Remember what you deserve. I know it can be frustrating. I've given pep talks to at least two people this year who were so frustrated with the trenches that they said they were willing to take anyone.

Do not do that to yourself. Focus on what you deserve and keep on. (14)

Once again: someone being the most visible agent on here or stacked with the most famous clients doesn't mean they are right for you.

Your journey is your journey. Keep that at the front of your mind! (15)

I hope all this helps encourage someone today to prioritize their needs and feel more like the wonderful, deserving author they are! (END)