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So we're at the last toxic tale this week while I take a short break from today's #amwriting. This one isn't so much one, single compound, but a class of similar compounds: the phorbol esters of the manchineel tree.
Let's get this out of the way. The manchineel tree is evil. Like truly evil. It doesn't just want us dead. It wants us to suffer the burn of a thousand hot suns. And the chemical culprit? Phorbol esters, like the structure in the last tweet.
The manchineel tree is native to the Caribbean, growing along beaches, where unsuspecting tourists fall for its traps. The locals know all about it and try to warn us, but we're dumb and don't heed their warnings. [pic by Jean & Nathalie (CC BY 2.0)]
![The manchineel tree is native to the Caribbean, growing along beaches, where unsuspecting tourists fall for its traps. The locals know all about it and try to warn us, but we're dumb and don't heed their warnings. [pic by Jean & Nathalie (CC BY 2.0)]](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/En1mopaXEAE4kj7.jpg "The manchineel tree is native to the Caribbean, growing along beaches, where unsuspecting tourists fall for its traps. The locals know all about it and try to warn us, but we're dumb and don't heed their warnings. [pic by Jean & Nathalie (CC BY 2.0)]")
You see, every part of the tree is toxic and everything you'd want to do near the tree is a horrible idea. Even its fruitaceous little offspring wants to kill you. The Spanish name for it "Manzanilla de la muerta" means "little apple of death." [pic by Barry Stock (CC BY-SA-2.0)]
![You see, every part of the tree is toxic and everything you'd want to do near the tree is a horrible idea. Even its fruitaceous little offspring wants to kill you. The Spanish name for it "Manzanilla de la muerta" means "little apple of death." [pic by Barry Stock (CC BY-SA-2.0)]](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/En1ngvzXEAIkcmv.png "You see, every part of the tree is toxic and everything you'd want to do near the tree is a horrible idea. Even its fruitaceous little offspring wants to kill you. The Spanish name for it \"Manzanilla de la muerta\" means \"little apple of death.\" [pic by Barry Stock (CC BY-SA-2.0)]")
Don't believe me? Check out this video of some dude named Adam that decided biting into one of the "apples" was a good idea. It's just pure pain. I'm not sure if he's delirious with pain or drunk. Probably a lot of both.
Gotcha, don't eat it. What about touching it? That's a no. They even warn you about that, too. When cut, the tree exudes a latex with those painful phorbol esters, and much like poison ivy, spreads around to other parts of your body. [pic by Scott Hughes (CC BY-SA 2.0)]
![Gotcha, don't eat it. What about touching it? That's a no. They even warn you about that, too. When cut, the tree exudes a latex with those painful phorbol esters, and much like poison ivy, spreads around to other parts of your body. [pic by Scott Hughes (CC BY-SA 2.0)]](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/En1pKAIXcAIpOpX.png "Gotcha, don't eat it. What about touching it? That's a no. They even warn you about that, too. When cut, the tree exudes a latex with those painful phorbol esters, and much like poison ivy, spreads around to other parts of your body. [pic by Scott Hughes (CC BY-SA 2.0)]")
In 1936 two dudes had manchineel latex on their hands and then urinated. Uh oh. Extreme pain and looking like 2nd degree burns. Words you should never read: "desquammation in shreds of the mucous membrane of the glans penis."
tl;dr Their dicks were shredding and peeling apart
tl;dr Their dicks were shredding and peeling apart
And don't even think about standing under it. It's not an umbrella. Those phorbol esters are water-soluble. During those torrential tropical storms, the rainwater picks it up and dumps it on your head. And skin. And eyes. Great pain ensues. [pic by Gael Cardon (CC BY-SA 2.0)
All this pain is because phorbol esters stimulate inflammatory responses. So that's the tale of toxic phorbol esters from the manchineel tree, Nature's not so subtle reminder of who's still in charge around here. Take care everyone, and have a great weekend!
