Join me while I live tweet my induction

I’m dilated at a 1 (sorry, if that seems TMI but also not sorry) and I’m in pain so that also seems fake to me

I’m the doctor here

“Are you planning on an epidural”

I’m planning on taking as many drugs as you wanna give me don’t even ask

Just got a COVID swab.

That’s probably the worst part of giving birth right now, right

my nurse’s name is Karen please pray for me

We got Spongebob and a thermostat we can control so we’re basically living the dream

Just popped my pussy for a pill that’s supposed to get this girl out so that was a good time

me when they said they’re going to speed up inducing me with a foley balloon

Just found out today is International Men’s Day(???) so my baby will NOT be making her appearance until tomorrow.

I’m still at a 1 so this is the conversation I just had:

me: “can you make sure I’m contracting”
nurse: “you are! here they are on this sheet”
me: “okay I thought I was just being dramatic”

also just had a popsicle and orgasmed or it was another contraction idk

We’re at a 3 and I want to die

Real bored