1/ Common confusion about non-coercion: It's about accepting ALL parts of you.

-The part of you that enjoys/doesn't enjoy things
-The part of you that thinks instead of feels
-The part of you that wants to please others.
-The part of you that wants to punish yourself.

2/ A bastardized version of non-coercion often involves trying to figure out which parts are "really you" and listening to those. This is where you get objections against non-coercion like "Sometimes you have to do things you don't enjoy, it can't all be non-coercive."

3/ Or objections like "Sometimes I wish I wanted something, so I coerce myself into wanting it." This is confusing "The part of you that enjoys things" with "all of you."

4/ In truth, if ANY part of you wants something, that part can be integrated in non-coercion. Even if it's to please others. Even if it's to hurt others. Even if it's a part that doesn't feel things, but thinks them.

5/ If you're getting ANY objection to being non-coercive, then you're not truly being non-coercive - to do that, you would need to integrate the part that is objecting.