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Unpopular opinion: From what I could see of Finding S.A.M., I didn't see a problem with it. I was an autistic middle and high school English teacher for 14 years. I was also the school and later district wide anti-bullying coordinator.
I was very widely known as the teacher who was best for teaching autistic, ADHD, and otherwise neurodivergent kids. I’m autistic, ADHD, and dyslexic with other dignoses. In my final year, I started my graduate education in psychology. The protagonist was a 7th grader.
I taught 7th grade for 11 years. That’s very much my wheelhouse, and I used novels paired with audiobooks for a large percentage of my year. I obtained 22 grants, many for teaching social issues through fiction.
At that age, developmentally, blending in and being "normal" compared to peers is central to values. It's not usually until tenth grade or so that kids start to want to develop an identity that is unique and individualized. The use of the R-word & harmful language is realistic.
Kids that age can be ruthless as bullies. Real life is far more brutal than what I saw in that book. But fiction doesn’t exist as a how-to guide. It’s driven by conflict, and that middle grade conflict is usually centered on blending in or being an outcast.
As a teacher, I would have loved to have taught that book. It would have been an amazing springboard to a million conversations to help build an understanding of autistic people and also to have conversations about parents and authority figures, emotional neglect, etc.
In literature, the protagonist is 99% of the time a dynamic character, meaning they experience a change through the primary conflict. In this book, the conflict is that a 7th grader is embarrassed that autistic brother is in the same middle school.
I would have used that as a springboard to talk about neurodiversity, ableism, bullying, tolerance, & acceptance. Further, there are a lot of clues in the screenshots I've seen that are pointing to the fact that the protagonist is autistic, too. We could use it to unpack ableism.
A novel about a happy, inclusive, functional family is not interesting to middle school kids who very much are melodramatic because they’re still developing social nuance and their instincts are to secure a place in a social identity.
This is the point where teachers and administrators most fail to teach the values that will become solidified throughout life. They absolutely need to be guided into better awareness and acceptance at that point.
Parents often fail their kids in this arena, which is reflected in the book. The parents don’t know how to deal with conflict or how to support their kids in navigating different social and emotional conflicts. This is where a teacher can be transformative!
I had a student, Jamari, who was the most thoughtful and humble student. He really flourished in my classes where he usually was too shy to interact. He’s an adult now and tagged me the other day on a post in Facebook about the novel, The Outsiders, to thank me for teaching it
That book is mentioned in Finding S.A.M. It would’ve been great to teach them as complements along with one of @sharonmdraper’s books about bullying and racism. We could tie everything from all three books together to talk about intersectional social identities.
Absolutely, there are thoughts and sentiments expressed in the book that are horrifying, which is what makes books valuable. The secret to middle school development is that almost all kids at that age are perpetually masking.
They are just beginning to see themselves as primarily a member of a peer group, where before they saw themselves as primarily a member of a family. The author did so so so many things that his brother did, but in ways that were more socially acceptable or masked.
There’s also so much irony in the book! There’s dramatic irony where the audience understands more than the protagonist or other characters and has more information or insight than the characters. This is exaggerated in the book and developmentally appropriate for middle grades.
The protagonist has all this wishful thinking about his brother, but he didn’t realize he was doing the same things. Also, the primary road block for the character is something that his autistic brother had already overcome. The brother isn’t the problem. Ableism is.
Caring too much what others think is the problem. Bullying is the problem. The narrator projects those things onto his brother and accepts the brutal status quo. He doesn’t want to be a good person, or an enlightened person, or a heroic person. He wants to be “normal.”
That’s very typical of a 7th grader. It’s sadly typical of most people. But the autistic brother fights for what he wants despite social norms. The norms ARE oppressive, and giving those up is too scary. The protagonist doesn’t see what the readers will see:
the autistic brother isn’t the problem. He isn’t the one who needs to change. The parents are the problem. The teachers are the problem. The kids are the problem. Bullying & exclusion are the problem. I had faith that the climax would have been where the protagonist realizes this
This is NOT meant to disparage or disrespect the autistic reviewer who disagreed with me and published the screenshots. What’s sad is that I believe they are also right. I do NOT trust teachers and adults to use books like this to promote the right values or even see them.
I also am very impressed by the publisher’s decision to halt production, even if I personally disagree with the reviewer’s insights on the book. I am VERY grateful to @redchairpress for centering our community’s insight & wishes, even if I individually disagree with the majority https://twitter.com/redchairpress/status/1326931887097589762
I’m sad for the author, whom I think may have redeemed the disturbing aspects of this book with the climax & resolution. I think the bullying and ableism was realistic, and it was intended to be jarring and disturbing.
I also think kids don’t realize what they’re doing when they do and think the same harmful things as the characters because it’s so “normal.” I thought the heavy use of the word “normal” to express a positive value was ironic and purposeful and drove the primary conflict.
I thought the autistic brother was the one round character— or a complex character with nuance and insight and understanding that of beyond most people in the plot. He was beyond the petty that everyone else demonstrated. (Cont)
As a teacher, I would’ve rocked that book. I would have helped everyone through the concept of social exclusion and structural prejudice and tied it in with other intersectional exclusion from other books (body shaming, racism, religious bigotry, misogyny, homophobia, etc.)
I didn’t read the whole book. Only what one astute autistic reviewer published of it. To be very clear, I think their reaction to the book was fair and justified. I also think mine is fair and justified.
Mostly, I think it’s important to respectfully disagree in open dialogue while still understanding and honestly, authentically, and humbly trying to understand from the perception of others. There’s no absolute right or wrong. I also didn’t read the book, only excerpts.
I’d love to offer my insights on the excerpts— as a counter from an autistic perspective. I was an undiagnosed sibling to a brother who was much more obvious than me in the same school. I was having to pick up for my parents who clearly didn’t know what to do and be the adult.
I understood my brother and hated everyone for not getting him or for being mean to him. It would’ve been much easier to “cure” my brother than all of society. And even today, I still react to social problems with hyperbolic, exaggerated solutions.
I try everything I can to counter bigotry (with a focus on racism & ableism), but I can’t get the majority to change. I feel it’s an unsolvable problem in the moment. I think “burn it down.” I often get angry at myself when 50 people misunderstand my autistic communication.
I internalize that if 50 people read more into my words than I intended, that I’m the problem. I hate myself because it’s easier than hating 50 people who are ignorant to disability. It’s easier to say that I am the problem. It’s hard work to take on the whole world.
And really, that’s what the 12- or 13-years old protagonist is facing— systemic ignorance in a middle school setting. That’s a lot of pressure on a kid— neurotypical or masked autistic. That kid has no validation or help from adults to process all that and frame it.
I think that’s a very important Truth with a capital T. The world is failing the autistic person in the book, through exclusion, through failing to provide support, through failure of educators to teach neurodiversity and acceptance (to the autistic student & to the mainstream).
From what I saw, I really thought the book was powerful. If the author was ignorant and intended to portray the characters as wise or accurate or doing things right, that wouldn’t have mattered in my class.
I would’ve taught my kids to understand that they contributed to the impossible and difficult situation BOTH brothers were a devastating victim of, that as children they inherited and are tasked with navigating with no help from the people who are supposed to help.
