Read on Twitter
For as long as I’ve had my Twitter account, one thing has remained unchanging throughout many top 100s and a good few months of discovering new music: Tyler, The Creator’s IGOR has stood as my favorite album of all time since the beginning of my account.
Now, I could explore a few different factors as to why it’s my favorite. How Tyler’s exploration of neo-soul inspired instrumentals are genre-bending and executed perfectly, how it has easily some of his best performances, how the concept is simple yet fleshed out immaculately.
But in this thread, I’d like to focus on the more personal aspects of how IGOR truly arrived at the perfect moment in time for me, and why it’s so intimately linked to where I am today.
Part 1: Context
I was 14 when I discovered Tyler’s music last year in November. He was the first artist who I listened to seriously. At the time, I was sort of a mess. I was deeply socially awkward, had terrible self esteem, and was struggling heavily with my sexuality.
This had been a struggle for me for almost 4 years. I had never been able to accept the fact that I wasn’t straight, and had suppressed those thoughts, contributing to previously mentioned problems. I’m a proud bisexual now, but at the time, I was unable to accept this.
Now, it may seem fairly obvious where IGOR factors into this. A story about a bisexual man who struggles with a toxic relationship and ultimately comes out the other side a stronger person sounds like it’d be relatable for me at that time.
However, I never fully understood the concept and themes of the album until one, life-changing night.
Part 2: That Night
I’ve told this story a host of times, and I still remember vividly what had happened. I had been feeling exceptionally depressive that week, and it all sort of hit me that night. I just cried, staring at my ceiling, full of self-loathing and a crumbling sense of self-worth.
I was on the verge of running from my home, running somewhere away from where I was to maybe go somewhere where no one knew who I was. But an impulse within me brought me to put on some music, and it had just so happened that I decided upon IGOR.
Highly emotional and with a sense of emptiness in my heart, I closed my eyes and let the music play. For the next 39 minutes and 46 seconds, I felt like that void was filled. I didn’t feel alone.
I had found myself really paying attention to what Tyler was saying, and found myself understanding what was happening: a famous person who was struggling with their sexuality just as I did.
And the best part about IGOR is that, in the end, Tyler finds the happiness he seeks and is able to finally come to terms with his sexuality. I cried myself to sleep that night, not out of sadness, but out of a sense of relief.
Part 3: From There
Now, resolving my feelings about my sexuality wouldn’t really happen until I came out to my close family and friends in the coming months. Slowly, that lead to me working through other issues.
I’m now proud of who I am, I’ve stripped myself of a lot of the social anxiety and awkwardness that characterized my social interactions, I dress in a way that makes me feel good about myself, and I’ve found new passions.
Whether that be helping the Gender-Sexuality Alliance at my school, or writing about music, it can all be traced back to that one vital listen. I truly believe that I wouldn’t be the person I am without IGOR. And that, folks, is why IGOR is so important to me.
I want to thank you guys for listening, I decided to write this thread on a whim and think that I covered the reasons why I love this album and why it’s deeply important to me pretty well. Have a nice day.
