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(TW: loss, 22° degree, HEAVY, "predictive" astrology, abuse, ab*rti*n.)
In this thread, I'm going to go into where the notorious 22° is in my chart, and how I believe that has already played out in my life.
In this thread, I'm going to go into where the notorious 22° is in my chart, and how I believe that has already played out in my life.
For those who aren't familiar, the 22° has gathered a lot of attention for being the "kill or be killed" degree of astrology. Astrologer Nikola Stojanovic theorized that the 22°, in any sign, is in many charts associated with death.
In my chart, my Saturn is RX in 21° 29' Pisces (in my 5th House), most astrologers suggest rounding up degrees, so in this case that would be 22°. My Saturn is also sextile my natal Neptune 22° 54' RX in Capricorn (in my 3rd house): 23°.
So let's go into it:
So let's go into it:
When determining pregnancies, it's been suggested to look at your 5H for your first, then 7H, 9H, 11H, 3H, & repeat. (@/iJaade has a great thread on this).
The 5H also covers children, inner child (childhood), and optimism.
The 5H also covers children, inner child (childhood), and optimism.
I experienced an unexpected (23°) pregnancy (5H) during a time where I was fearfully agoraphobic (pisces) due to resurfacing traumas (12H profection year) and felt powerless (saturn rx) to the father (saturn) of my child (5H).
I was fearful of mothering (4H) my child (5H) where I was living (4H) because I'd recently found out there was sexual abuse in the home (12H, secrets exposed). The first person I informed about the pregnancy was my step-sister (3H: siblings) who lived with MY father (Saturn).
My father is a narcissist (pisces: illusions) & psychologically (neptune) abused me (saturn rx) as a child (5H). He started to get heavily involved over the phone (3H) and caused me self-doubt (pisces) about my capabilities (capricorn) overall.
My natal Saturn is also opposition my natal Sun in 19° 22' Virgo (11H). The abuse I experienced (saturn rx) as a child, from my narcissist (19-20° virgo: secret enemy) father manifested as me seeing myself (sun) as unworthy of joy (5H), love (5H), and children (5H).
Equally, this represents becoming an enemy (19-20° virgo: secret enemy) of myself (sun) by continuing the abuse inward and restricting (saturn rx) myself (sun) from happiness (5H), and not allowing myself to follow my dreams (5H, pisces) of becoming a mother.
My natal Venus in 25° 31' Virgo (26°) (11H) is also opposition to my natal Saturn (5H). The father of my child and I met each other through friends (11H) after I had attracted MANY (26° virgo) failed and difficult relationships (saturn opp venus).
Because my Venus is at 26° (attracting many) in my 11th House (friends, social circles) I ended up dating a LOT of people who were my friends, or friends of friends. Resulting in a lot of painful endings, isolation, and loneliness (Chiron in my 11H).
This left me very wounded (chiron) around the time our relationship (venus) started and throughout it. I was extremely dependent on him as I processed through the traumas (12H profection year) that were resurfacing from my childhood (5H).
All of these influences left me in a very helpless (saturn rx) state of mind (3H) that ultimately led to me going into shock (23°: figurative lightning, uranus) and detaching for a long period of time (saturn). I could no longer think (3H) or communicate (3H) for myself (sun).
This led to the father (saturn) choosing a different route than we had originally agreed to, and resulted in the loss of my child (5H). You could technically define that 22° as a choice of ab*rti*n, even under an altered (neptune) or influenced mind (3H).
When I came back from shock, I mourned the loss heavily as if someone (or myself) had k*lled my child. I still feel that way, and I feel as though a part of me died that day.
The 22° could represent the "choice" itself regardless of whether or not I was aware of it happening.
The 22° could represent the "choice" itself regardless of whether or not I was aware of it happening.
This would support the running theories around Nikola Stojanovic's original theory involving the 22nd degree, in astrology.
I also strongly remind everyone that FIGURATIVE death is equally as plausible for 22°.
I also strongly remind everyone that FIGURATIVE death is equally as plausible for 22°.
It's difficult to talk about these topics, so I ask that if you comment on this thread to take my loss into account and approach everything you say here with that understanding.
Thank you.
Thank you.
