Because I talk about #sober life pretty openly, and I'm cool with people approaching me about it, one question I get often is "how did you know you were an alcoholic?"

So I'm gonna answer that..

I think it's necessary to put a disclaimer here that this is my personal experience. Also, some of these things combined or own their own may not be indicators that you are an alcoholic, but it's all about degree and context.

Now that we have that out of the way..

1. Constantly Making Excuses to Drink - spontaneity is great, but I always had [flimsy] excuses to drink; stress relief, anxiety, boredom, and at some point, I even stopped justifying it to myself. I could always find a reason, and eventually, I didn't need one. I just drank.

2. Drinking Alone / In Secret - this went from occasional to daily; partly because I was isolating, and partly because I already knew something was dysfunctional w/ my drinking.
My cupboards were full of empty [mostly quarter] bottles that I'd sip after work & into the night.

Solo drinking became my norm, & because there was no one to check me or know just how much I was drinking, I thought I had everyone fooled. That's the crazy thing about alcoholism; you're deluded that your drinking is under control, you lie first to yourself and then to others.

PS: they know - you're fooling no one!

3. Socially Inappropriate Drinking - this was anything from turning every social gathering into an opportunity to drink [as Kenyans, we excel at this, lol..], drinking outside of acceptable hours, and keeping my Purse Bar stocked. As long as I was up, I wanted to drink.

Also, I would worry about whether events had #alcohol, and plan my life around this. I had zero interest in things that previously brought me joy if there was no alcohol involved.

4. No Limit - you know those people who can enjoy a glass or two and call it a night? Yeah, I can't relate. It's like there was never enough alcohol, and I could never say no to a drink.

5. Withdrawal - when the booze wore off, I was a moody nightmare! The physical & emotional reactions to not being drunk were enough to get me drinking first thing in the morning. And I often did.
I eventually had the shakes 24-7 if I hadn't drunk.
The anxiety was overwhelming.

6. Alcohol > Commitments & Relationships - I would always prioritize my drinking over obligations and people that I cared about. This one bites you in the ass, because people stop prioritizing you too, but I can't blame them. The alcoholic is a manipulative and hurtful creature.

I became extremely unreliable, dishonest, and honestly toxic AF, because I allowed this illness to completely take over my life.

The lies I spun during this time to facilitate my drinking were something else..

7. Trying To Quit, And Failing - every month I would declare it a sober month, mostly to prove to myself that I didn't have a problem, but I don't recall making it past a few days. If you've tried to take a break, experience physical withdrawal symptoms like the shakes / nausea,

and are unable to stay off the sauce for any period of time, you may have a problem with alcohol.

I could never stop and stay stopped. But #alcoholism isn't a willpower / morality issue. It's a disease.

But like I said, this is all my subjective experience, and alcohol use disorder can express itself differently.
I hope this thread helps someone

If you're still wondering if you have a drinking problem, you can check out the tests on this link https://www.rehabs.com/assessments/alcohol-addiction-quiz/

As always, my DMs and comments are open if you want to chat [be civil, please]

PS - Honorary Mentions:
* drinking at work
* accidents / physical harm
* blackouts / short term memory loss