"Give a man a fish, and you feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish, and you feed him for a lifetime"

#StartUpEp9 really made me think about this quote.

There was a subtle example of this when Dalmi had a problem with negative reviews and comments on NoonGil.

(A thread)

Dalmi was getting very bothered by the comments and reacted emotionally. Everyone at Samsan, including Dosan noticed this.

Because a comment about battery life was upsetting Dalmi, Dosan decided to spend some time and fix the battery life.

He didn't necessarily do this to satisfy a business need. Battery efficiency wasn't one of their priorities. He did it for Dalmi's comfort only.

Later, During her meeting with Jipyeong, Dalmi was still annoyed and complained about the way that a particular customer talked about the product.

Jipyeong had a much different way of addressing this issue.

First of all, it wasn't that he didn't care for Dalmi's comfort. He noticed that she was getting worked up and overheated, so he turned on the AC for her.

Then he helped her direct her focus and think more strategically about how to react to customer feedback.

In a startup environment, it is very important to set the right priorities and time is a valuable resource. Fixing every user complaint is not an efficient use of time.

Although he has feelings for her, he wasn't preoccupied with saying things to make her feel good. Instead he helped her understand where her priorities needed to be, so that she would know how to handle ALL future comments, not just this particular one.

Effectively, he teaches her to focus on the big picture, which doesn't always bring immediate satisfaction, but longer-term rewards.

There is a key difference between a person like Jipyeong and Halmeoni (the puppetmaster) or Dosan.
They have an immediate focus on seeing her smile & making things easier for her.
Not considering that you can't always fix the bug each time, and you can't sustain a lie forever

They don't realize that she will only grow by being able to see the big picture, with freedom to make her own decisions.

And as her loved ones, their job is simply to provide the right tools and support her to keep learning how to address her own needs.

In a meaner sort of way, Injae is another person who pushes her to grow. I hope that when they reconcile, she can become a strong ally and challenger for Dalmi.

For the swing metaphor, I often see it framed as swing vs sandbox.
One guy is the swing while the other is the sandbox.

But I think Dalmi's natural abilities are her swing, and those around her can either be a sandbox or a mother who tells her not to play on the swing anymore.

With the right support (or sand on the ground) Dalmi can swing as high as she wants.

She doesn't need things done for her or lies told to protect her feelings.
Don't give her a fish, instead teach her how to fish.
Even if it's harder for a little while, she will come out stronger in the end.

After all, remember this?