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The LA Times wants - insists - that you "search for empathy" for Trump voters. In support of this, they have drafted Republicans to make the case for themselves (the combined abilities of their bench of writers being apparently insufficient). Here's what they came up with.
1. I am an evangelical minister. I say I was torn about voting for Trump, but - like 75% of white evangelicals - I voted for him anyway. I am generally supportive of theocracy and I vote against abortion rights.
2. I like money. Fuck you ha ha.
3. I provide no details about myself whatsoever - good luck learning from this one Democrats!
4. I'm mad. I'm making reference to boarded up storefronts in Democratic cities but it is not about race. I'm also mad at Michelle Obama, who exemplifies elitism to me - a white woman from Santa Barbara. That's not about race either.
5. Trump got lots of votes because he put money in the pockets of working people. [the LA Times rigorously fact checked these letters so, y'know, don't worry about it.] I want lower taxes but mostly I hate the media.
![5. Trump got lots of votes because he put money in the pockets of working people. [the LA Times rigorously fact checked these letters so, y'know, don't worry about it.] I want lower taxes but mostly I hate the media.](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Em0hWOyVQAA2jcf.png "5. Trump got lots of votes because he put money in the pockets of working people. [the LA Times rigorously fact checked these letters so, y'know, don't worry about it.] I want lower taxes but mostly I hate the media.")
6. I didn't vote for Trump but bc I'm a Huntington Beach conservative, Democrats should care more about what I think than they do about people who are politically aligned with them think about things.
7. Now that my party is no longer in control, it's time for you to compromise with me. I call this being pragmatic (at least, to your face).
8. I'm a climate change denier!
9. My husband is a litigation partner and I am staunchly opposed to affirmative action. Life is fair because things have worked out well for me personally!
10. People think I'm racist but when the president calls countries shitholes I understand what he actually means: namely, he thinks they're shitholes and so do I but it is kind of silly to say so out loud. Funny guy!
11. The problem isn't the Democratic Party, it's the left wing of the Democratic Party. For example, notorious leftist Hillary Clinton. The Dems will continue to underperform [ed note: winning popular vote in 7 of last 8 elections] until they listen to me.
![11. The problem isn't the Democratic Party, it's the left wing of the Democratic Party. For example, notorious leftist Hillary Clinton. The Dems will continue to underperform [ed note: winning popular vote in 7 of last 8 elections] until they listen to me.](https://pbs.twimg.com/media/Em0kx5nVoAA1U-t.png "11. The problem isn't the Democratic Party, it's the left wing of the Democratic Party. For example, notorious leftist Hillary Clinton. The Dems will continue to underperform [ed note: winning popular vote in 7 of last 8 elections] until they listen to me.")
Ok that's it. Better know a republican is concluded. Shake the stardust and moonbeams out of your hair before you go, you enlightened kings and queens.
