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HOW TO SPEND THE HOLIDAYS ALONE: A THREAD. Thanks to COVID and its consequences (unemployment, etc.) some of you will be alone over the holidays for the first time. A few people have asked me for advice. Here you go. The first thing to remember is this: the holidays, and 1/x
Christmas in particular, is a season. I'm going to be alone on December 25, but I'm enjoying the hell out of the season. My tree is up, my lights are strung, and I'm drawing Christmas cards (art is one of my hobbies). What are your hobbies? Find a way to enjoy the season even 2/x
if you're going to be alone on the last day of it. Pandora has many wonderful Christmas offerings. Go look up Trans-Siberian Orchestra on YouTube (Christmas Canon is a masterpiece). Even if you believe, as I do, that the story of Jesus is not literally true, it is absolutely 3/x
full of beauty and metaphorical truth (thank you @bretweinstein and @heathereheying for that helpful concept). Redemption, hope, renewal, light in the face of darkness and despair--these matter, and we need them in 2020. Lacking the physical presence of loved ones on the 4/x
day itself doesn't have to negate the rest of it for you. It really doesn't. Other tips: DO NOT let yourself slip into self-pity. Self-pity is the thief of perspective, joy, focus. Don't go there. DO take a big picture view. You'll always have the memory of Christmas 2020, as 5/x
the Christmas that was yours alone. Make it a special one. DO get creative. Buy some nice stationery and write 24 small notes and 1 long letter. Send it to someone you love, giving them something small to read each day of December that will lead up to a Christmas morning 6/x
letter expressing your gratitude, your hope for them in the new year, etc. If you can afford it, send a box with 24 small gifts (candy, hand warmers, and other small things work well for this). Making it about others is the best defense against self-pity. DO have a plan for 7/x
the day of the holiday, especially if your mental health is shaky. I'm long past serious suicidality but I keep a suicide hotline in my phone anyway. 800-273-TALK. If you have addiction issues or otherwise are at risk of really derailing your life on impulse, take steps to 8/x
take care of yourself. It's A Wonderful Life is on Amazon Prime. Buy some high quality cocoa and your favorite food and plan for Christmas Day to be special just for you. If restaurants in your area will be open (Waffle House is typically open on Christmas; likely will be, 9/x
where permitted) go have a nice breakfast and leave a Christmas morning sized tip. DON'T forget how lucky you are. Spending Christmas alone because of a pandemic that hasn't killed you or loved ones is a lot better than many will be doing. Some will have Christmas alone 10/x
this year with a fresh cancer diagnosis. Others will have painful memories of last Christmas, when they owned a business (prior to the riots) or had a good job and their circumstances have drastically changed. If you will be alone on Christmas in the same place you lived 11/x
last year, with a similar standard of living, you are incredibly fortunate. Finally, focus on the love in your life. Your sadness at being away from loved ones is, itself, evidence of great good fortune. If you have people who love you and who you love so much that you are 12/x
pained by being apart from them at the holidays, you have won life's lottery. Christmas alone doesn't have to be scarring, unless you choose. It can be a time for reflection, gratitude, and creativity to nurture your own relationship w/yourself, which matters. Choose well. /end
Christmas Canon, by Trans-Siberian Orchestra. Beauty. Hope. "We are waiting...we have not forgotten."
