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So I wanted to share my experience of going into hospital for a routine test earlier this week, in an effort to keep the conversation around #TransHealthcare within the NHS going.
CW for misgendering and medical mentions in this thread.
CW for misgendering and medical mentions in this thread.
When you change your gender marker under the NHS in the UK, your 'NHS Number' also changes and that essentially erases your deadname and previous gender from the records. I went through that process a while ago.
My GP referred me for these tests. She explained to me that...
My GP referred me for these tests. She explained to me that...
... because they were in an area of my body where my anatomy differed to that of a cis woman, they'd need to make a note of that on the referral form. Fine, I said, it wasn't changing my gender marker back or anything, just ensured I didn't get prodded somewhere I shouldn't.
I got to the hospital, and was greeted with 'sir'. I corrected them, several times, but the same person continued with 'sir' and 'mr' and pre-ticked all of the gender options on forms to male.
Figured I'd correct it when I got to sit down with a nurse to do pre-sedation checks.
Figured I'd correct it when I got to sit down with a nurse to do pre-sedation checks.
I sat down with the nurse in a consultation room to go through checks, more being called "sir."
"Oh, please don't call me sir, I'm a woman." I said to the nurse.
"Very funny, sir."
Her response was to assume I was making a joke.
"No really" I said.
"Oh, please don't call me sir, I'm a woman." I said to the nurse.
"Very funny, sir."
Her response was to assume I was making a joke.
"No really" I said.
"Very good sir, now here is your gown, please undress over there and let me know when you're done"
And she left the room. I sent a couple of frustrated texts to friends and got changed. At this point I was more nervous about the upcoming test than anything else.
And she left the room. I sent a couple of frustrated texts to friends and got changed. At this point I was more nervous about the upcoming test than anything else.
I opened the door to signal that I was done, but the nurse was nowhere to be found. A new nurse arrived moments later, said the former nurse had gone on a break, and that she was here to take me to the procedure room.
"I just want to check that the last nurse made a note of...
"I just want to check that the last nurse made a note of...
... my gender correctly?"
"Yes she did sir, this way."
Guessing that's a no, then? Into the procedure room, onto a table, and nurses and a senior nurse practitioner are bustling around me talking to each other.
I'm nervous about the test, and I can't get anyone's attention.
"Yes she did sir, this way."
Guessing that's a no, then? Into the procedure room, onto a table, and nurses and a senior nurse practitioner are bustling around me talking to each other.
I'm nervous about the test, and I can't get anyone's attention.
Eventually, the staff turn to me and ask me to confirm things on my consent form. I tell them "I'm not a man" and am ignored.
The sedation goes in, and the next couple of hours are a blur of pokes and beeps and prods and things flashing up on a screen.
The sedation goes in, and the next couple of hours are a blur of pokes and beeps and prods and things flashing up on a screen.
I wake up in a male recovery room with no curtains drawn, in a gown that barely concealed my body, with nurses calling me "Mr. [Surname]".
I'm confused, I'm scared, and I'm sure as hell not about to correct them in a room filled with men whilst half conscious.
I'm confused, I'm scared, and I'm sure as hell not about to correct them in a room filled with men whilst half conscious.
My friend arrives to pick me up, and with COVID restrictions I have to be walked to the front of the hospital to get picked up. He makes a point of using she/her pronouns for me, and I ask the nurse if she can give me details of how to complain.
She directs me to a website and asks "is everything okay, sir?"
"Yes" I say, "You keep calling me sir!"
"Okay sir, take care!" she said as she walked off.
"Yes" I say, "You keep calling me sir!"
"Okay sir, take care!" she said as she walked off.
My friend commented on the journey home that they misgendered me on the phone to him too.
I've written a formal complaint, but was in two minds about sharing the story publicly as I love the NHS. But a friend reminded me that by sharing these stories can we make change.
I've written a formal complaint, but was in two minds about sharing the story publicly as I love the NHS. But a friend reminded me that by sharing these stories can we make change.
I genuinely love the NHS. I want to support and protect it at all costs. But it's clear that years of austerity have taken a toll on patient care, on training and development, and on how staff see the accommodation of simple requests.
Going into hospital is a nerve-wracking experience for anyone, and trans people shouldn't have to be made to feel more anxious just because of who they are.
It's made recovery so much harder, even for someone who usually prides herself on not letting things like this get to her.
It's made recovery so much harder, even for someone who usually prides herself on not letting things like this get to her.
