I was asked recently about divisiveness on twitter, and how I engage reasonably with a range of different people and opinions. It led me to some interesting thoughts I'd like to share, and which may be useful to anyone - even people who hate my opinions otherwise. 1/10

First off, let me say it's hilarious to be cited as a model for constructive engagement. In real life, I'm considered blunt and tactless, if not an outright asshole. But I maintain roughly the same tone here, while others crank it up to 100. There's a lesson in that alone. 2/10

The big thing is this. I don't consider twitter to be the main outlet for my social engagement. I see great value in social media. Talking to one another is good. Shouting all the time, maybe less good, but still it's something. In the end though, it's all hashtag activism. 3/10

Twitter helps us hear other ideas, if we listen, and even if we don't helps us sharpen our own if we write carefully. That's the value to me. What I'm writing this moment is Exhibit A. I hadn't really thought this through before, and I think it's useful, at least to me. 4/10

Once we firm up our own ideas and values, however, there's got to be more action than just tweeting at people with different ideas and values. Or worse, tweeting within a limited circle of people who already agree with us, and basking in the reassurance that we're right. 5/10

I am fortunate to have a job where I help people in the real world with real problems, that often (though not always) gives me a chance to apply my values directly. I volunteer on the board of a local not-for-profit, and participate actively in my chosen political party. 6/10

I'm not saying these are the things everyone should do, or pat myself on the back. I'm just saying these are real things in the real world. They help me feel like I'm doing something, which I actually am. And it's so much more important than the latest argument on twitter. 7/10

If you find yourself desperate to win arguments here, consider if twitter is really the best way to influence the world for the better. And if you view this as the most meaningful way you're trying to do that, well I'm sorry, but maybe look for something more real as well. 8/10

Doing stuff outside social media not only has greater impact, it brings you into contact with nuance, and complexity, and people you may disagree with but also can't block or shout down in all caps. And most of the time, we don't even want to. Because the real world is real. 9/10

If you disagree with my values and choices, that's fine. Go live your own. Engage and contribute however you can and feel comfortable. On twitter, we'll still disagree. But I suspect it won't feel so damn urgent anymore. Because actions matter more than words on a screen. 10/10

P.S. I've followed a few remarkable people here, whose engagement on twitter was the last way they had to reach out to the world. I don't want to take anything at all away from situations like that. I'm just saying, so long as we have the option of doing more, we should be.