This account's 5th birthday is in 2 days. To celebrate early, today I'll be posting one quote every hour from my favorite WHM episode, Gooby (it's episode 85, if you have access to the back catalog and want to listen along).

"There's just something about the taste of another person's blood..."

"Listen, I'm not saying you should murder hobos. I'm just saying you should THINK about it"

"You guys ever look up at the stars? Feel the great darkness lurking beyond them? Wonder what it would be like to just let it in?"
<Puzzled silence>
"IT'S NOT ALL CUM JOKES, OKAY!"

"Listen, I'm never NOT hearing inhuman voices urging me to commit atrocities!"

"So anyways, I was down at the docks last Tuesday..."
"Wait, wasn't that the day they found that body?"
"STOP INTERRUPTING ME!"

"So I'm sitting there, just staring into the fire, drunk off my ass. And he's lying next to me. And I feel this sort of tugging in my head. And I look down. And there's a knife in my hand. And I look at him. And suddenly, I know it's gonna be a fun night!"

"You know that feeling when you suddenly come to. And you don't know where you are. And there's a bloody knife in your hand and a body at your feet, covered in symbols you understand but cannot read?"
<Co-hosts are baffled>
"IT'S A UNIVERSAL EXPERIENCE! THE AUDIENCE GETS IT!"

"Guys, we like to joke around on this show, but I want to be serious for a second. I have never thought about just how delicious your organs would be. <Stunned silence> What? I said I HADN'T thought about it."

"I remember the first time I killed. I kind of got a taste for it after that..."

"The thing about murder is that, ultimately, it's pretty boring. It's boring to watch in a movie. And it's boring to do."

"I think what did it, more than anything, was watching their eyes go glassy. No glint of heaven in them. Just dullness. Nothing interesting there."

"The thing is, once you give in, it kind of keeps happening. You lose time. You know something's up, but you don't know what. You feel yourself slipping away... But the crazy thing is, you kind of like it."

"I'm more it than me these days. I think it's gonna just... take me soon. Send me wherever we go when we're done, and take my body as its own. I'm looking forward to it."

"So, I just tried to go to the bathroom. Kind of looks like the door's locked. Is there something you want to tell us, Eric?"
"Why do you want to leave, Andrew? We're not done. You can leave when we're done."