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Funny story from around 2008.
Wingman from Quetta (first time in KP) wanted to see this place. That was peak Mangal Bagh Laskar e Islam era. We told him it wasnt safe. But he insisted. Needed the photo on his 2 Mega Pixel (still a huge deal back then) cellphone.
So we are.... https://twitter.com/ShafeeqGigyani/status/1326863533821333504
Wingman from Quetta (first time in KP) wanted to see this place. That was peak Mangal Bagh Laskar e Islam era. We told him it wasnt safe. But he insisted. Needed the photo on his 2 Mega Pixel (still a huge deal back then) cellphone.
So we are.... https://twitter.com/ShafeeqGigyani/status/1326863533821333504
...snapping photos. All northerners from Peshawar, Mardan, Lakki, Khyber, showing a Southner from Quetta our land. 'Look charas shop'. 'oh look, that is NATO loot souvenir shop. You should get some'. We get to the fucking Bab e Khyber and fucking Mangal's boys on like 100 vigos
(double doors,they were called back then I guess)with assault weapons mounted on them descended on the nearby Khasadar compound (or is it a camp office for APA Jamrud).All guns blazing. Utter chaos. People running for their lives.
Now, none of us was native to the land, except..
Now, none of us was native to the land, except..
...the boy from Khyber and so the onus was on him to rescue the guest from Quetta and the rest of us from non-khyber to safety. This was the time of suicide bombings so your natural reaction was to hit the ground when you heard explosive. So we are lying on the ground in shock
..and it took us a few seconds to realise what was happening. The next step was to figure out which way we had to run coz them bad motherfuckers were coming from all directions.(To be fair, they didnt mean to harm civilians,but they considered collateral damage to be Allah's will
So if a civilian died in the process, so be it. You were shaheed in the wrong place and the wrong time. They had no qualms about it).
So as the dust from the vigos, explosions and firing settles, one of us goes, 'where the fuck is Mangal! Which way are we supposed to go?'
So as the dust from the vigos, explosions and firing settles, one of us goes, 'where the fuck is Mangal! Which way are we supposed to go?'
Not the fucking Mangal. The bus conductor turned TTP war lord, Mangal Bagh. But the lad from Khyber whom we nick named Mangal because he was always yapping about Mangal this, Mangal that, Mangal slaughtered 10 today, Mangal picked another tycoon from Hayatabad for ransom.
Quetta waal yelled, 'cheere ba zu zama zo?' where do we fucking go!!
And I was like, 'how the fuck would I know!I am a city boy.I have never been outside of Peshawar city. Hayatabad is the farthest west I have been.Ok maybe Karkhano market which Afridi claim falls in Khyber but
And I was like, 'how the fuck would I know!I am a city boy.I have never been outside of Peshawar city. Hayatabad is the farthest west I have been.Ok maybe Karkhano market which Afridi claim falls in Khyber but
Peshawaris disagree. This is Khyber. I am not a native here and you are the one who insisted on coming here. FUCK YOU! Do you know what we say in Peshawar about Afridis. If your right hand is Afridi. Dont use it. Cut it and through it away. It will betray you!'
Khair, long story short, we made it to safety with help from a kind brave elder who realised we were city boys and spent a good part of half and hour in safe place near the Bab. The assault ended. I dont know what they strategic objective of it was but they didnt slaughter
...anyone. Took no prisoners. Khasadars locked themselves up in the compound and they didnt gate crash the place. I assume the objective was to tell the administration they could penetrate into Peshawar if they want. The point was adequately made and Mangal's men left.
After peace prevailed, Mangal Bagh appear wiping his forehead. Not the real one. But our classfellows.
'You guys ok?'
'fuck you!! You left us to fucking die. You were our host. Where the fuck was your Nang (honour). Is that how you leave you guest to fucking die' a very angry
'You guys ok?'
'fuck you!! You left us to fucking die. You were our host. Where the fuck was your Nang (honour). Is that how you leave you guest to fucking die' a very angry
Quetta waal said. 'staii pashtunwali ki za da khpala DAGGA wawam!'(Allow me to shove my Dagga in your Pashtunwali).
When a Quettawaal is angry u will hear the word Dagga a lot.A word we do not have in northern parts. Gheen in Peshawar. GhaNr in Southern KP. Ghayndd in Swabi).
When a Quettawaal is angry u will hear the word Dagga a lot.A word we do not have in northern parts. Gheen in Peshawar. GhaNr in Southern KP. Ghayndd in Swabi).
I would like to get to the origin of the word Dagga. I find it fascinating. How is it that two groups of tribes speaking the same language have evolved two different words for such an important fundamental thing but that is a topic for another day.
The Afridi nonchalantly wiped his forehead with his romaal. He was sweating like a pig. Folded his romaal back into his jaib and goes,
'gora da mangal bagh goolay ta da pata da che zaa Afriday yam aw ta Quetta waal?' (Does a bullet from Mangal Bagh know that I am an Afridi and
'gora da mangal bagh goolay ta da pata da che zaa Afriday yam aw ta Quetta waal?' (Does a bullet from Mangal Bagh know that I am an Afridi and
you are a Quetta waal).
Quetta waal ponders the Q which seems to have, in the context of what had transpired,taken him aback. Stutters. Replies,Na.
'Nu bya ba di om daasi manda wahala che sanga ma wahalee wa' said the Afridi.
(Then u should have run for your life like i did).
Quetta waal ponders the Q which seems to have, in the context of what had transpired,taken him aback. Stutters. Replies,Na.
'Nu bya ba di om daasi manda wahala che sanga ma wahalee wa' said the Afridi.
(Then u should have run for your life like i did).
Now 12 years later, the Afridi still has no sharam for what he did that day, leaving us stranded in a shootout. Says he did the right thing. Survival is a basic human instinct and flight a basic reaction to existential threat. This is how our species have survived and evolved.
And that he cant be blamed for us not having our wits about us in a time of danger and crisis.
Shit went down that day and we have a great story to cherish from it.
Shit went down that day and we have a great story to cherish from it.
